High School Love (Jungkook)

fourteen

It's hard to deal with the pain. Everything seemed to lose its color; it was as if the life was sucked out of me.

I didn't go to school for at least a week. Oppa understood and swore like a sailor when Changjo told him the news.

The news... Jungk... God I can't even say his name. The thoughts of him are like poison; I take one little dose, and it kills me instantly.

I've barely eaten anything. Food isn't something I enjoy anymore. My body craves for something else, but I can't have him.

Who knows how much weight I've lost. My collar bones stick out more, and my legs have gotten thinner. I guess that's okay.

With my big blanket, I sat on my bed for days, staring at nothing. Changjo always came over after school, checking to see if I've returned to my normal self. Unfortunately, I'm not the Hana I used to be.

"Hana," Changjo stood at my door with his backpack slung across his shoulder.

I was sitting up, which surprised him.

"Woah, this is a major improvement. You're sitting up," he smiled sweetly.

I know Changjo is my best friend, but I feel like he made him do this to me. I try to be happy around Changjo, but it's just not the same as being with him.

"I was actually about to go grab something to eat," I scratched my nape.

His eyes widened in shock.

"Is this my lucky day? You actually want to eat! Stay here, I'll go get you something." With a snap of his fingers, he dashed off.

Surprisingly, a chuckle escaped my parched lips. Did I just laugh??? What's going on with me?

My eyes glanced at the mirror, spotting a stranger. Her skin was pale, and eyes were lifeless. Her lips cracked, and her hair was in a mess.

I looked so bad.

I saw 20 new notifications when I checked my phone. Most were just missed calls from Taehyung and Namjoon. There were only two messages I received.

Taehyung-
Hana! What's wrong?? Jungkook locked himself in his room. Did something happen between you two?

Namjoon-
Hana, I'm sorry for what happened between you and Jungkook. I overheard the call... Call me when you can. Get well soon<3

I hesitated, unsure if I should reply to them.

I need to. They're my friends.

Reply to Taehyung-
I'm sorry for not replying back, I just needed some alone time. I don't feel comfortable talking about the situation right now, but I assure you I'll tell you sometime.

I decided to just call Namjoon instead of texting.

"Hello?"

"Hey, it's Hana."

"Oh hey, Hana. How are you?"

I bit my lip. "I've been better."

"I'm so sorry for what Jun-"

"Please," I gasped,"Please don't say his name. I'm sorry, I just... I just can't hear his name right now."

"I understand, my apologies. Do you want to talk about any of it?"

At first, my thought was no, but I feel like I can trust Namjoon. Maybe it would be a good idea to vent out to him. "I would like to, but I'd prefer to talk in person."