"Bullshit!" I growl. I notice Nathan getting up without a word. He was hoping for more and now he has no hope. He leaves the building, he always leaves when the going gets tough.
"Who is it?" Tyler asks.
"His name is Jacob." Jacob? Who the hell is that? Why am I only hearing about him now?
"Jacob who?" he demands.
"Jacob Warren," she shrugs. "You don't know him." Good job too because I'll beat his ass. Why is she doing this to me?
"Are we going to meet him at some point? I'm glad you are moving on, Sis." Tyler looks at me, probably to check I'm not going to lose it. I scowl at him, I'm so angry.
"It's early days, I don't want you to meet him and you break us up as aswell." They aren't staying together, over my dead body! Tyler may not break them up but I sure as hell will. I don't care if I'm being selfish, deep down I know she only wants me.
"I'd only do that if he's bad for you," he frowns. "Is he good to you?"
"He cares about me," that was a pitiful defence!
I stand up, "Outside, now Ri!" She rolls her eyes and stands up. I storm out of the building and when I'm outside I turn on her. I grab her wrist and she flinches. "What the hell?"
"What?"
"You said I would be your only and last! What is this?" I shout.
"Jake didn't want me to keep it secret anymore. We can't be together Flynn. He wants to be around me. He's not scared to have me close." That's a low blow! Jake now is it? Hell, I'm so pissed.
"Are you punishing me for protecting you? You said you don't do the whole boyfriend thing what changed?"
"I'm not punishing you but I resent you for it. Nothing really changed, it's hard to explain." Nothing has changed? So what is going on exactly?
"Do you love him? Have you had sex with him?"
"Flynn," she sighs. "You don't understand. It's complicated." Either she is in love with him or she's not, I don't see how complicated it is.
I cup her face and she shuts her eyes. She feels icy cold, she's relishing in my touch as she normally does. She wanted to hold my hand this morning. I just don't understand, "You love me Ri, you only want me. You are mine, why are you doing this? If I kissed you right here right now you'd kiss me back. I know you would so why are you tormenting me like this?"
"You wouldn't understand. Do you expecting me to die single? I need to move on from you and Jake is helping me with that. He knows everything. . . " Does he know everything? Even her darkest secrets. If she's told him that then she's too far gone, I won't be able to reach her.
"I'd understand if you just told me what's going on in your head."
"I can't," she whispers. She looks in so much pain right now. I sigh and walk back into the pub. I sit in my seat and I feel Tyler watching me.
"You need to let her move on," he says.
I glare at him, "But she's not happy, do you not see that? If she was I'd accept it!" I growl. No, I wouldn't but if it was truly what she wanted I'd let her be. Maybe.
"You don't think she's happy?" he frowns.
"I know she's not happy. Something is seriously wrong bro but you're not hearing me." I down my drink and stand up, "I'll see you later after class, you walking with me?" I ask Regan and she nods. She holds my hand as we walk out of the pub. When we are outside Riley has vanished. We walk back to campus and I walk Regan to her classroom.
She pulls me in for a kiss and I kiss her back. Why can't I be with other girls? Riley is so fucking complicated that it would be easier to give up. I push Regan away and walk off to the gym. I'm not in the mood for classes. I vent my anger out on the punch bag. I pound my fists against the bag over and over.
I need to find out who this guy is. I need to know if he truly cares for her. Maybe he is the reason she's so edgy recently. Once I've been in the gym for an hour I shower and get into my clothes. I walk to my last lecture and endure it. I meet Tyler and we eat out early and then we head to the ice rink.
We head to the reception desk, "Hi," the girl says.
"Hi, two for skating," Tyler says.
"Is that with or without skate hire?"
"With," he says. The girl nods and rings up the till. Tyler swipes his card, I've been so preoccupied with Riley recently I haven't even bothered to argue about paying. We walk into the ice rink area and its fucking cold.
We head to the skate hire window and I spot Riley instantly. We get into the queue and I watch her serve the people in front of us. She looks adorable in her beanie hat. Riley rolls her eyes when she notices us, "Babe, do you want me to serve them whilst you go on a break?" a guy says and I growl. Tyler shoves me, what? We came here to see her did we not?
"Nah, I'm good Bug," she shrugs. "It's nearly my shift to go on the ice anyway." Oh, that's good then. "What are you doing here?"
"Can't I visit my sister at work?"
"Sister?" the guy gasps. What's it to him? He offers her something from a packet and she grins at him. She pulls out the strawberry lace and she snaps it in half. She holds one half out to him and he takes it with his mouth and I growl. Tyler elbows me again and I scowl.
"Is this him? Is he your boyfriend?" Tyler asks. Better fucking not be. I'll kick his arse right here right now. The guy laughs and puts his arm around my girl.
"No, this is Jax my friend from work." Why have we not heard of him before if he's just a friend?
Jax puts his lips to her ear and I growl again, I get another blow to my ribs from Tyler, "Jealous ex? Do you need to pretend I am?" Riley laughs and takes a bite of the strawberry lace. She seems comfortable with him.
"Thanks for the offer, but no. I think he might murder you." Too bloody right I will! She knows me too well. "Shoes," she demands and we hand over our shoes. I glare at Jax whilst Riley grabs our skates. He grins at me, what is his game exactly? She hands us some skates, "I'll go on the ice and take over from Maya."
I walk away before I murder someone, I'm not fussy on the who right now, "Bro, cool it, you are acting crazy."
I roll my eyes, "She's purposely antagonizing me," I growl.
"That's my sister for you," he shrugs. I sit down and start pulling my skates on. "Let her breathe," I roll my eyes. She's fucking breathing, okay? When we have our skates on we walk to the ice. I wobble when I get on the ice. I can skate but it's been a while. Tyler wobbles too. "Fuck! I forgot I can't skate."
I laugh loudly as he grabs the side to keep him up, "That's funny, bro," we skate and Tyler falls on his ass. I can't stop laughing. He scowls at me and I help him up.
"Stop laughing," he growls.
"You are funny as fuck bro," I skate away from him but I can't stop laughing. I feel her and I stop skating and scan the ice. She's at the far end and she's talking to some guys. They laugh at her and I frown. They skate off and she watches them. They knock some dude over and Riley skates towards them. They stop dead and Riley is going too fast.
Fuck! I start skating towards her, one guy bends down to trip her up and she gracefully jumps over him and lands the other side of him. I stop, okay, she has this under control. She grabs one of their arms and spins and they fly towards the gap in the wall. I grin at my girl she's badass. He falls in a heap on the floor outside the rink. The other guy skates towards his friend and Riley follows.
She says something to them and they look in awe of her. I slowly skate towards her and the guy climbs to his feet and they walk away. She spins abruptly and skates into me. I put my arms around her and she tenses but soon relaxes when she sees it's me. "Flynn," she gasps.
"You knocked into me," I grin. I keep holding her to my body and I smell the strawberry laces on her breath. "I was coming to your rescue but it looks like you didn't need it."
"I can handle myself, you'll do well to remember that," I throw my head back and I laugh. She slaps my chest and I grab her wrist before she hits me again because it fucking hurt. She cringes and I frown. I pull her sleeve up and I see bruising on her wrist. What the actual fuck!
"What the fuck is that?" I look at her face and she looks shocked. I look back at her wrist, it's recent, it wasn't there when I bathed her. I would notice that. "Riley," I warn. I need answers. She doesn't answer me, "Ri, answer me," she slides her sleeve down so I can't see.
"I fell on the ice," she says feebly. This doesn't look like a knock.
"Bullshit! When did you start lying to me? Keeping stuff from me? It wasn't there yesterday so where did you get it Ri?"
"It's nothing, you know how clumsy I am."
"Is someone hurting you? Is it Jake? Whatever his name is? I'll kill him if it is."
"Calm down, Flynn, do you really think I'd let anyone else lay a finger on me? There is only one person that could and he's dead." She retaliates, she keeps saying she's seeing him and she turns up with bruises. I don't understand. I don't think she'd let another guy hurt her either. She's telling the truth with that.
"Are you sure? You can tell me anything, Ri, anything," I urge. Please tell me what is going on. She smiles at me.
"I know and I love you for it but we can't keep doing this, I'm not yours to protect anymore," see she still loves me. I roll my eyes, I'll always protect her. Is she trying to tell me something?
"How many times? You'll always be mine, I'd better see where your brother is," she nods and I go to find Tyler. He's still holding the side when I find him as he wobbles on the ice. "Bro," he falls on his arse again. I help him up, "I'm worried about your sister."
He rolls his eyes, "When aren't you?" he sighs. "Why this time?"
"She's got bruising on her wrist. It wasn't there yesterday. I have a bad feeling again bro."
"You think someone hurt her?"
"Yes, that's what I'm saying but she won't tell me what happened. Well, she did but it was a lie. She's hiding something."
He sighs, "What do you want me to do?"
"There's nothing you can do," I shrug. We skate for another twenty minutes or so but Riley seems to have swapped with Jax, "Okay, that's it. I'm done, let's go home." I nod and we walk towards the counter and she jumps down as she was sat on it. "Are you working tomorrow, Sis?" Tyler asks when he reaches the counter.
"Yeah from 7.30 though. Like I said, I'm seeing Miley tomorrow." We pass our skates over and she walks away and returns with our shoes.
"Good, I'll bring my date here after dinner." She rolls her eyes. "You want to double date, tomorrow Bro?" Not really, no but I guess I can keep an eye on Riley then.
"Sure, I guess." She glances at something in the corner of the skate room and I frown, "Shall we wait, Ri and walk you home?"
She looks at me again, "No, it's okay. My boyfriend Jake is coming by to pick me up." The hell! She glances in the corner again. What is over there?
"He's just dropping you off right?" I demand.
"He will probably stay like he did last night." The hell! He stayed last night? I slam my fists on the counter. I walk away with my shoes.
"Why are you antagonising him, Lee?" I hear Tyler say. I walk out of earshot so I don't hear her reply. I quickly shove my shoes on and I keep walking out of the building. "Bro!" Tyler calls. When we get outside it's dark. Tyler catches up with me, "I don't like it either, especially as I don't know the guy but you can't let your anger control you."
I punch the brick wall, "He stayed last night! He must have been who texted her. She was vulnerable last night, fuck knows what damage he did to her!"
"Calm down, how do you know he caused damage?"
"She's shutting me out, she's so fucking cold again. She hasn't been this cold since I first met her. If he's touched her, I'll kill him."
"She's not your property, you don't own her," he insists.
I turn and face him, "She's mine! She still loves me, she said it! So why is she doing this? I told you I have a bad feeling!"
"Maybe you aren't seeing clearly. Maybe your rage and your jealousy are making you see things that aren't there."
"No, I'm not crazy!" I growl. "I know her!" I walk away from him.
"Where are you going?" he demands.
"I need a drink," I keep walking until I find a pub. "Jagerbomb," I demand. The barman nods and starts pouring my drink. I sit at the bar and Tyler slides in next to me. The barman passes me a drink and I down it. "Another," I demand.
"I'll have a beer," Tyler says and the barman walks away. "You need to calm down bro," he demands. I can't fucking calm down. When she leaves, she's having a random in her apartment and if she's vulnerable he could take advantage of her.
"If I find out he has fucked her I'll hunt him down and kill him," I growl.
"Bro, she's moving on. If she wants to have sex with him then you can't interfere," he glares at me.
"She doesn't want to. She only lets me touch her sober! I know her and I know she won't willingly sleep with anyone else."
"Maybe they will literally just crash. My sister can handle herself these days. Things change all the time bro, her feelings may have changed."
"No, they haven't changed." He sighs and I down my next drink. I drink until things become hazy. I get up to piss and I knock into someone.
"Watch where you are going," the guy growls.
"Maybe I like getting into dickhead's paths," I shrug.
"Bro," Tyler warns and he's by my side. "He's drunk, I'm sorry."
"Keep him on a leash," the guy growls. "Are you even old enough to be here?" I punch him and he topples to the floor. He gets up and lunges towards me and we throw punches at each other. A bouncer grabs the guy and Tyler drags me outside.
"Get off me, bro," I growl.
"Enough!" he shouts. "Just get over her already!"
"I can't!" I protest. "She's a part of me, I love her so fucking much!"
"She's just a girl!"
"No, she's mine! You know how I feel! I can't just let go of my feelings for her." Tears fall from my face. "I need her," I cry.
"Hell! What are you doing?" he says repulsed. I hug his neck and continue to cry.
"I love her, I need to keep her safe."
"Bro, stop crying," he groans. "You're fucked, let's go home." He helps me walk back to his car.
"I fucked Clara the other day."
"How, you said you couldn't."
"I can't. I had to think of Riley to do it. I needed Riley to hate me, she kept ringing me and saying she needed me. It was the only way! But I couldn't do it, well I did but I didn't finish. It was all wrong. I love her. I can't have her hate me. If I went to the hospital maybe she wouldn't be this way."
"You don't know that. Let this play out, you never know, he may be good for her," we reach his car and he opens my door and pushes me in. He puts my belt on and shuts my door. I close my eyes. I know something isn't right, I know I'm not crazy. I hear Tyler get in and he starts the car.
I am the only one that is good for her. No one is good enough for her, I can't trust anyone around her. I doze until Tyler pulls me out of the car. He escorts me to the elevator and I rest my face on the cold mirror.
I stumble towards our apartment and Tyler stops outside her apartment. He knocks on the door, "She won't answer," I inform him. He glares at me, "What? She won't."
I slide my hand in my pocket and I pull out my keys. I throw him my keys and they hit the wall. I guess my aim is shit when I'm pissed. He picks them up off the floor and he puts her key in and it's stopped by the chain. See, she's not letting anyone in.
He sighs and shuts the door. He walks to our door and lets us in. "I need my bed," I inform him.
"Yes, I think you do. You are more emotional than her when you're drunk," I ignore him and I walk into my room. I strip quickly and I flop on my bed. As soon as my head hits the pillow I'm gone.
When I wake my head hurts. I shower and make myself a coffee. I grab a bite to eat but I'm eager to see Riley. I leave the apartment and I walk to her door. I try the key and it opens and the chain isn't on. Has she been out already? I hear the shower running and I frown.
The shower turns off and I hear a door shut. I walk to her bedroom door and try open it but it's locked. What the hell! "Ri," I call trying to get in. I look at her door and there is a hole in it. What the hell! "Open the fucking door. What happened to your door?"
"I will be out in a minute. I'm getting dressed," she yells and her voice breaks as though it's sore. Why has that stopped me coming in?
"Ri, hurry the hell up or I'm going to kick the door down." I pace in front of the door. I don't like this one bit. Okay, that's it, I kick the door open and she's sat on her bed applying makeup. I frown at her.
"Flynn, you broke my door!" she looks like utter crap again. She looks worse every day, not any less beautiful but her spark is fading. She's wearing clothes that cover every inch again.
"Why are you putting makeup on? You don't normally when you see Miley, you don't normally shut the door on me either," I grab her jaw and she flinches. "Something's different, Ri." I feel sick, I know something is wrong but I can't do shit about it because I don't know what it is.
"Lots of things are different, Flynn," she pushes me off her and she finishes applying makeup.
"You know what I mean, Ri. I'm worried about you," I'm literally losing my shit worrying about her.
"I told you, you don't need to be. I'm fine," she's not fine but I'm glad to see her alone. She gets up and slides some boots on and a jacket. I follow her out of the room and she takes her meds. I'm surprised she remembered them.
"Ready?" I ask and she nods. She walks to the bathroom and comes back in whilst she attaches her brace. Why was she not wearing it? We leave the apartment and she locks the door. She grabs my hand and I frown. She has a boyfriend but she's holding my hand? She feels icy cold and it scares me. She withdraws instantly.
I take her hand and look down at her, "What?" I ask and she shakes her head. If she wants to hold my hand she's got it. Boyfriend or no boyfriend.
"You are burning me, literally scolding me," I frown. Okay, I'm really worried, why is she so cold? We step into the elevator.
"I didn't think I burned you so much anymore," I'm so fucking confused. When the doors close she jumps into my arms and I hold her instantly.
Fuck! What is going on? "I feel so cold and dirty," she whispers. No! No fucking way! She slept with him last night. No wonder she's so cold. She always felt dirty when other people touched her but mostly she felt dirty since him.
"Dirty but. . ." I pull away from her look at her. "You slept with him didn't you?" I growl. A tear escapes her eye and as soon as the doors open she bolts. "Ri!"
"I'll find my own way there!" she calls. I follow and quickly grab her arm and she winces.
"Just get in the car Ri," I can't keep doing this shit. I need her and she's sleeping with someone else. We climb in the car and I belt up, I can't look at her right now. I pull away.
"You don't understand," she whispers.
"No, I don't fucking understand Riley! I understand nothing because you won't fucking tell me! What do you want from me? I tell you I love you more than anything and you get a boyfriend. You tell me you'll never be with anyone else and then you sleep with the fucker!"
I see her bring her knees to her chest, "I'm sorry," she whispers.
"Save it, Riley. We really do need space, I can't keep doing this," sobs rack her body and my heart stops. Why is she so upset? "Ri, don't cry," I say softly. I didn't mean to make her cry. I pull over into a car park and I cut the engine. I unbuckle her and I pull her onto my lap. She continues to cry uncontrollably into my neck.
"Don't hate me, I'm sorry," she whimpers.
"Shh, baby. I'm here, I'm sorry for getting angry at you. It must have been a big deal for you to have sex with him and I let my jealousy get the better of me, I'm sorry."
"Flynn. . ." she sobs.
"I'm here, baby."
"James," I tense at his name. Why is she bringing him up again? I don't understand, why is she so upset? I push her face away from my neck so I can see her.
"What about that fucker?"
Will she tell me what has her so upset? "He's in my head, Flynn. I'm crazy, there's something really wrong with me. Jacob Warren isn't real. I don't have a boyfriend, a real one at least." What the hell does she mean?
She leans into my hands and I hold her face, "What are you saying?"
"I'm saying I'm mentally insane. James is stalking me, he's dead but I see him, Flynn. I know I'm crazy, he's my boyfriend. I can't explain it, I don't understand it."
"You aren't making sense, Ri. What do you mean you see him?"
"He's real in my head, I thought the bruises were all in my head," what fucking bruises?
"What bruises?" I growl. She starts removing her coat and then she lifts her top over her head and my eyes widen. I gasp and I gently trace her bruises. She has a black and purple bruise on her ribs as if she's had a blow to the ribs. I move to her neck and there is more bruising there. What the hell happened to my girl? It looks like someone strangled her. "What the actual fuck, Ri?"
"I don't understand what is happening, Flynn. I'm scared, James hurts me. I told you he can make me do anything. I want him near me especially when you wanted distance." She believes this is James? She kept saying she saw him but I didn't believe her but the bruises are evidence.
"You think this James is hurting you? He does this?" she nods. "Fuck!" I shift her on my lap and pull my phone out. If he's alive I'm going to kill him myself.
"Bro," Tyler says.
"Tyler, this James fucker. You said he was dead. Is there proof?"
"I told you my Dad saw the death certificate. Other than that no, why?" I fixate on the bruises on her skin, they are really bad. Her neck, her ribs, her hips, her arms.
"Well, you better fucking find proof. Your sister is covered in fucking bruises, she claims he is hurting her! If he's alive I'm going to fucking kill him." All these signs and I ignored them. I should have fucking listened. She tried to tell me but we all thought he was dead.
"The hell, let me speak to her," I pass her the phone.
"Ty," she whimpers. I continue to skim her bruises and she doesn't stop me. "I don't know, he's dead. I mean he's in my head but he feels so real. I don't understand what is happening." She nods, "Yeah," she hangs up and passes me the phone. I lob it on her seat.
"Your sore throat?" I ask.
"He strangled me," I screw my face up. I let her down, she said she needed me and I ignored her. I cup her face and she leans into my touch.
"Why?" I need to know everything.
"He touched my scar, he didn't like that I didn't want him to touch it. He did it anyway and asked me what happened that day. He freaked out when I told him I was pregnant. He punched my door and then screamed at me for killing him and his baby."
"Ri, why didn't you tell me this? I was right next door when he was hurting you," I touch the bruise on her ribs. "This one?"
"He was there, in my head last night at the ice rink. He said he didn't want you two to see him yet. It confused me that he said that if he's in my head. He was hiding in the corner when you returned your skates." I knew she was looking at something. It all makes sense now, she was looking to him for direction. "He started asking about his Mom and then Brad. He got angry that I had sex with him. He asked me how many people I had sex with since he died. I couldn't give him an answer. He punched me in the ribs. I couldn't breathe, he told me to tell Jax I was unwell and had to leave."
"Did he rape you Ri?" She shuts her eyes in pain. "I need to know, Ri."
"No, not really," she should know if he did or didn't! "The first night he. . ."
"He what, Ri?" Don't stop talking now.
"Well, he does this thing and I don't like it. I should be grateful but it makes me feel inadequate." She shivers.
"What did he do Ri?"
"He likes to lie on me naked. Like, skin on skin. He stripped into his boxers but he let me stay in my PJ's. He just slid my top up. We were watching a film and he. . . " Why won't she just say it? Where is she going with this?
"Just tell me Ri, you don't need to be awkward with me," I mean the things we've done.
"He fucked the sofa whilst he was laying on me. It wasn't the first time he's got himself off with me right there. I mean I wasn't even good enough to turn him on or you know." She seems ashamed. Is he blind? Why the hell would he do that?
"What's wrong with this guy? You turn me on just looking at you."
"Last night he was angry as hell, told me to shower. He never showers with me, I mean I was glad but it's like he's disgusted at the thought. I washed his clothed as they were really smelly. Once he was out the shower he made me strip like the stupid sex tape. I wanted him to fuck me but I also really didn't! You changed me, I always wanted him to before. It meant he loved me, but I was conflicted. I wanted you." And I wasn't there. Hell! I fucked up big time.
"He fucked me from behind and told me I was a whore and if anyone else fucks me he will kill them and me." She must have been so scared, me shouting at her probably did me no favours. "He made me ride him whilst he was holding my wrists behind my back and he was pulling my hair back, I couldn't move. He made me really sore and it hurt."
In my opinion that is clearly rape. She said it herself, she couldn't move. She was trapped. I hate to hear this but I need to know. "I blocked him out and went to our safe haven. I find that sleep makes him disappear, he's always gone when I wake up. So sleep blocks him out of my head." She sighs, "I feel dirty, Flynn. I was in the shower ages this morning. Nothing works!"
"Did he use a condom?" she nods and I sigh with relief. "Baby, I wish you would have told me. I don't think he's in your head. I think he faked his death and now he's found you."
"I killed him! I lost myself when he died! I went through hell because he died. He has to be dead, Flynn. He has to be," she panics as she cries. I know baby, I wish he was dead too. Look what he did to her. I push her to my neck to comfort her, "I'm scared."
"I know baby, I'm going to protect you, my lost soul." I'll never let him hurt her ever again.
"I'm not scared for me, he will hurt you. He could kill you. You would see red and you'll get arrested protecting me. I can't see you in prison because of me." She's scared for me? She's cute, I'd be fine. I'm sure her Dad would save me as gratitude.
"I'm not going anywhere, baby. I will protect you," I rock her until her tears dry up. "Everything will be okay." I lift her over to her seat and she puts my phone in the cupholder. She pulls her top back on. It's probably a good thing, it only pains me to see the horrendous bruising. She belts in and I start the engine and I pull away.
YOU ARE READING
Her Lost Soul 2
عاطفيةThe second instalment of the series in Flynn Archer's perspective. How will he react when the love of his life is withdrawing from him? When finds the cause of her worries, how will he react? All he wants to do is protect Riley but he hates himself...
