We Were Bound | james potter

f o u r

chapter 4

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torment
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Faeryn rushed down the moving stairs, taking quick steps to the great hall. She didn't think about any of the nameless faces she was passing in the hallway. The only person who mattered was Remus. (And selfishly, herself. She has to go through the pain of the full moons, too.)

Once she reached the double doors of the great hall she quickly pushed them open and rushed in, plopping down next to Remus, who had his hand halfway to his mouth with a waffle on his fork. She didn't notice James and Peter sitting across from him.

"Remus, please, please, please don't let it bother you. It was a mindless hookup and I know the full moons tonight and I don't want you to stress yourself out and— kill yourself or something. And I hate to pull this card, I absolutely loathe the idea of using it against you, but if you are worried about this tonight you know how much it's gonna hurt me too. So please, please, just know she didn't mean anything. You still have a chance, moony. So please, if not for yourself, for me, don't worry about it." she said frantically.

Remus blinked, and set his fork back on his plate, he opened his mouth to reply. "No, no im not done. I know that I'm asking you too much and that you can't control your feelings but Remus, please. The last moon was so bad, I can't do this knowing you might end up dead." she begged.

His mouth was agape, he wasn't focused on anything but the fact that she didn't mention anything about his feelings being about a boy. He was scared she wasn't going to love him anymore, he was scared he was going to lose her, too.

He shook his head to bring his thoughts back in focus, "uh, yeah, okay. I'll try?" he said, flustered.

She smiled and kissed him on the cheek.

James cleared his throat across the table to alert her of their presence. Her eyes snapped to his.

"Oh— uh, hi boys," she said with an embarrassed smile.

She turned back to Remus, lowering her voice so that the other two boys couldn't hear. "I asked him not to come to breakfast, I can help keep him away from you if you need some time," she whispered.

He smiled lightly to himself, "Yeah, I'd appreciate that." he nodded.

She patted him on the shoulder and stood up to go back to the common room.

James and Peter were sat stunned across the table, mouths agape.

Remus scratched the back of his neck sheepishly, his cheeks reddening from embarrassment.

"Would you believe me if I said she was having boy problems?" he asked, more to himself than the other boys.

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Remus tried, he really did. But he could not stop seeing the image of him with that girl. The thought followed him everywhere, every time he closed his eyes. It was as if his own existence was created just to torment him.

He hated that he couldn't forget about it, because he knew that Faeryn was going to suffer in return.

He knew he looked like shit, with bags under his eyes, pale and skinny. But usually Fae managed better than him, she was usually able to stand tall and mask the aches she felt, charm the eyebags away.

But when he walked into Ancient Runes, he saw her slumped over on her desk, eyes closed and fingers twitching. He felt horrible for being the cause of her pain.

Maybe it wouldn't be so bad if he did end up dead after the full moon tonight. She wouldn't have to go through transformations every month, and the marauders wouldn't have to spend so much of their time trying to become animagi for him. (No matter how many times he told them no, they refused to stop their research.)

Yeah, they would be sad for a bit. But they would get over it, he's just a burden, someone for them to pity. Maybe it would just be better for everyone if he wasn't here anymore.

He plopped down next to Faeryn with a frown, she sat up when she realized his presence. She beamed up at him and whispered, "So, how long have you known?"

He furrowed his eyebrows.

She rolled her eyes at his obliviousness, "That you liked guys, bloody hell you're an idiot." she said with a slight smile to show she wasn't actually being rude.

"Oh! Uh— I figured out last year, I think," he said, taking out his needed books and supplies for the upcoming class.

She smiled at him, "It took you a long time!" she laughed and leaned closer to him.

"I had my first crush on a girl in second year," she whispered and sat back in her chair nonchalantly.

Remus's eyes popped wide. "What?!" he exclaimed loudly, causing a few heads to turn his direction.

Faeryn scowled at him and punched his arm.

"Be quiet!" she whispered.

"Ow! What the hell!" he growled back while dramatically rubbing his upper arm.

She scoffed, "That didn't hurt, you git."

He crossed his arms over his chest dramatically, "Oh yeah? How would you know?" he asked.

She gaped at him in bewilderment.

Oh.

They burst out into laughter, causing more heads to turn their way.

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Faeryn was in the boys' dorm room, pacing back and forth as the 3 boys stared at her confused.

Her eyes kept glancing out the window to check where the moon was, her limbs started tingling, alerting the transformation was about to take place.

Lily was unable to be with her tonight, it was Faeryn's first night in 2 years without her. And the connection between Faeryn and her brother had grown tremendously since she last had to go through transformations by herself.

Lily had to attend a prefect's sleepover with the other prefect girls, she had tried to get out of it, but it was required for her to be there.

So she could either thrash around in her bed alone or go to the boys' dorms and have them deal with it.

She figured since Sirius was one of the reasons tonight was going to be so bad, even though he was unaware of that fact, he deserved to be the one to help her. She also figured it was time they knew about the unexplainable connection between their best friend and his twin.

She stopped pacing misstep, and waved her wand, locking the door and setting a silencing spell. This caused the boys to become even more confused.

"Okay so, um" she began, plopping onto Remus's empty bed.

She looked up at the boys, "this might be kinda traumatizing, uh." their eyes widened.

Her toes started to go numb, her vision flickering in and out.

"So here's some explanation in advance, I don't have much time," she said frantically, cradling her head in her hand due to the horrible burning behind her eyelids.

"Ths is about to be really bad, really, really bad. Just know I'm gonna be fine." she nodded at them, holding in her sounds of pain as her toes began to burn.

The three boys were looking at her with nervous anticipation, waiting for her to elaborate on the cryptic sentences.

She waited as long as she could, before finally forcing out her words.

"I feel all of Remus's Transformations, all of it," she said before a string of curses fell from her mouth, and she felt the burning in her gums, indicating Remus's teeth were growing. The transformation had started.