Sunsets and Constellations | B X B

• T W E N T Y F O U R •

A R I U S

Arius was currently jotting down notes in Advanced Math class as Mr.Harold read off bullet points and conversions. He hadn't been sleeping well at all the past few days.
He kept having vivid, recurring dreams of the day he completely broke his arm. Except, everything was demonized a lot more.

His supply of lexapro, prozac and celexa was almost over. He'd been taking more than one dosage and a side effect was having nightmares and strange dreams.
He couldn't bear to wake up alone and sweat it out as he cried in silence, suppressing his sobs and raspy breaths as he struggled to recover from the shock. He had walked to Viggo's room in the middle of the night four times in the past week which is why he had insisted that Arius sleep with him since he didn't have a roommate anyway.
Even then, he woke up literally every night sweating and gasping for air. But Viggo was there, he was always there. And that was the only way Arius could differentiate in between dreams and reality.

"You will be assigned partners to complete this project." Mr.Harold said and started listing off names as Arius struggled to keep his eyes open.

"Johnson and Jay." caught his attention as he wondered who his partner was.

"Alright, switch places."

The whole class was in total chaos as everyone traded and changed places. Ryder approached his desk and dropped her backpack down as she sat on the chair.

"And we meet, again." He smiled, thankful that she wasn't a complete stranger.

"I can't believe he put the best students together." She mumbled.

"Narcissistic."

Ryder wasn't much of a talker. The only time she ever talked non-stop was around Jake or Elijah. She was on the shy side, but she was a total genius. She barely paid attention in class, but aced all her exams.

"Are you okay dude? You look a little-" She trailed off as she furrowed her eyebrows at him.

Oh, and she was incredibly observant. Which Arius hated.

"Yeah, yeah I'm okay." He said quickly, dismissing her question with a shake of his head.

But he wasn't, nothing was okay. His head was a complete mess. He was walking on eggshells all the fucking time. Tamara had wormed her way back into his life and his parents insisted he give her a chance to explain herself. And so he had agreed to listen. She was coming over to Charlottesville this weekend and Arius hoped against hope that she wouldn't come.
His mother simply loved the girl. It was frustrating because Tamara had her on her side and she wouldn't budge now.

He excused himself from the class and went to the washroom to wash his face. It had been weeks since he'd washed his hair. It was frizzy and the defined curls were not there anymore. His eyes looked glassy, cold and empty. So empty that Arius himself was shocked at how lifeless and brittle they looked. He had a few bags under his eyes and his lips were chapped and pale. When he looked at himself in the mirror, all he saw was a broken, troubled boy, tormented by the shadows of his past every single day. He was fucking tired. He felt like this was payback for the few days of bliss and happiness he'd had over the Christmas holidays in Elijah's company.

Elijah. Fuck. He recalled how wounded and angry he was when he'd seen Tamara kissing him. He thought of how they fought and got kicked out of math class. He thought of how he'd taken Arius to the soccer pitch. He thought of how he looked at Arius with longing and yearning. Who knew that the boy who had run into him like a passing stranger (literally) would kiss him one day under the night sky? And Arius wasn't supposed to like it.