SERIES 2: Trapped In Sadness

TIS Chapter 5

"You're different. The first time I laid my eyes on you, I knew you're not same as the women I knew here" — Evander Vestager
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"There's this girl... her name's Willa Jenica. Actually she's a Filipino." Huminga ng malalim si Evander. "I love her so much but I'm so stupid, I cannot confess my feelings to her." Lumingon ang lalaki kay Illyza at ngumiti ng pilit. "She likes my older brother."

Napabuntong hininga si Illyza sa sinabi nito. Nararamdaman niya ang sakit sa mga mata at tinig nito. Pinakatitigan niya ng maigi ang mukha ni Evander, pamilyar sa kanya ang pagkakahawig nito sa lalaking minsan na niyang nakilala.

"We were childhood friends, very very close with each other. But it changed when she confessed her feelings for him," he shrugged his shoulders at lumingon sa harapan. "It's only me who knew the truth, I don't have plan to tell it to my brother. Never." Tumahimik ito ng ilang segundo bago nagpatuloy sa pagsasalita. "It was then that, I became cold and distant to her. I was hurt, she don't know how she sliced my heart into two." Bumunga ito ng hangin. "She's the reason why I became into women. That I want to play with women, I want to do to women what she did to me... but in a gentle way."

Tumango-tango si Illyza. May parte sa sinabi nito na naiintindihan niya, may parte din na hindi. Tao lang din ito, nagkakamali dahil sa labis na pagmamahal — she understands that part. But, playing with women is a no. She's a woman, she knew how it feels to be played.

"Am I exception to that, ’women‘?" She quoted the last word.

Lumingon muli sa kanya ang lalaki. Malungkot parin ang mga mata nito.

"You're different. The first time I laid my eyes on you, I knew you're not same as the women I knew here." Pagkatapos nitong sabihin 'yon ay muli itong tumingin sa harapan.

The cold breeze of the city of New York creeps over Illyza's body. Napabuga siya ng hangin.

"Does it make you happy?" She asked.

Lumingon ang lalaki sa kanya na nangungunot ang noo.

"I mean, playing with women? Does it make you happy?" She explained.

Nagkibit balikat ito. "Sort of?" Patanong na sabi nito.

Kumunot ang noo ni Illyza. He's not that sure?

"So you're not, really..." aniya sa lalaki. "You didn't confess your feelings to her. How'd she know that you love her?"

"Even if I will, nothing change. She'll still marry my brother."

"That's if your brother likes her too."

Umiling-iling si Evander.

"They will still get into marriage"

Nakaramdam ng awa si Illyza rito. Pero agad din siyang nalito sa mga sinabi nito.

"Ha? I don't unders—"

"Everything was a deed of gratitude." Putol nito sa sana'y sasabihin sana ni Illyza.

"What?" Her forehead creased.

Umupo paharap kay Illyza ang lalaki kaya napaatras siya ng kunti. Ang isang paa nito ay nakapatong sa bench samantalang ang isa naman ay nasa lupa parin. Ipinatong nito ang isang siko sa sandalan.