Wildest Dreams

Chapter 40

tw// mentions of graphic violence, mentions of major character death, mentions of drug use

I am awoken from my dreamless sleep by the sound of my phone hitting the hardwood floor. I crack an eye open to reach for it and I figure it must have vibrated off the table because I was getting an incoming call.

Unknown number.

Without thinking, I hit accept and hold the speaker to my ear.

"Hello?" I say quietly, not wanting to disturb Spencer.

"Hey there, Y/n. Enjoying Vegas?" the voice on the other line asks.

At first, I am confused, but I would recognize that voice anywhere. It used to sound like home, but now it makes my skin crawl and stomach churn.

"How are you calling me, Leora?" I hiss quietly.

"That's not important. The important thing is for you to listen carefully to my next directions. I want you to go to the address that I texted you at eleven tonight. You will come alone and unarmed, and if you involve any of your friends at the FBI, you can kiss your husband goodbye."

"What do you want from me?"

"You will go inside the building and wait. You don't need to bring anything except your cell phone so Agent Hotchner has a chance of finding what's left of you," her sick laugh comes through the speaker.

"You can't do anything to me anymore. You're just playing with me."

"Sweetie, I tried to play with you but you always rejected me. Now I am going to take what I want and I don't give a fuck what you say."

"You're lying. This isn't real; it's just a bad dream," I say, mostly to convince myself.

"Tell yourself whatever you want, but it'll be your duggie of a husband's brains splattered on the wall if you don't do what I say, so make your choices wisely."

I feel my phone buzz in my sweaty palm and I take it away from my ear to look at the text message.

Stillwell Ave, Brooklyn, NY

"Coney Island? Why are you sending me there?" I ask.

"You'll see. Oh, and don't forget to leave Dr. Reid a note. I'm sure he'll be crushed when he wakes up and you're not next to him."

Her wicked laugh is cut off by the beeping of the ended call. I am left laying beside Spencer, the love of my life, stuck in a difficult position.

If I go, I may die without getting to say goodbye, but if I don't, then Spencer could get hurt as well as others. I need to do this alone.

I slowly climb out of bed so I don't disturb him and make my way into the bathroom. I dress in a simple pair of clothes that Spencer had packed for me and when I look in the mirror, I don't recognize the person who looks back.

The gold in my eyes that was there last night has disappeared, replaced by the kind of cold that fogs up windshield glass.

I splash my face with water to hopefully snap myself out of the haze I found myself in, but it does not seem to work. When I leave the bathroom, I look over the room and remember the events of the weekend.

Clumsily dancing in the street, proposing to him at the restaurant, getting married, how beautiful he looked underneath me. Now, as he is laying in bed, he looks as peaceful as ever; like an angel.

I take the notepad from my nightstand and start to write. It's not formally constructed or thought through; it's a stream of consciousness apologizing for everything I have put him through over these last few months. I have to keep myself from crying too loudly as I write, but a tear-stained gray from last night's makeup falls on the page, blurring the words slightly.

When I finish, I fold the letter and put it under the bottle of water on his nightstand. I lean over his sleeping form and press a gentle kiss to his cheek before I force myself to leave the room, knowing if I stayed any longer, I may never leave.

I slip on my sandals and quietly pull open the door, thankful that it doesn't squeak. I close it just as gently before I lean my back against it. Now, the tears fall freely and I don't bother to muffle my sobs.

Maybe we just weren't meant to be. The skeletons in our closets plotted so hard to fuck this up, and they were successful. I did believe that this could work out, but I don't expect Spencer to take me back.

I found my soulmate, and I'm never gonna love again.

-the end-