And I Loved You Maybe

When we see love in movies it's generally potrayed as an epitome of personal growth and healing. And i believe that is true. That is what love is.
But what most movies fail to potray is that before love intiates this amazing self growth, it makes you go through days of misery, of continous reflection, infused with regrets, of highs and lows that feel like your worst rollercoaster ride.
It makes you feel like youre going crazy. Like youre losing your shit altogether. But then again it feels as warm as a cup of coffee on a chilly sunday morning, as comforting as a breeze of soft wind on a sunny day. It does feel ethereal. Does feel euphoric. Enlightening even.
Ive come to define love as a paradox, a melting pot of emotions that never make sense but nonetheless enough sense to keep you going, keep you breathing. I find love beautiful but at the same time I find it painstaking. Achingly beautiful is what it is I think. See the paradox?
I loved you. I did. Didnt realize when it started. Dont know when it will end. Or if it will end altogether. But I dont think I'd ever be able to tell you exactly how much I love you without having you feel freaked out maybe? Maybe burdened? Maybe buried? Under the weight of my emotions.
So here I am, weaving my words into a tale that youll never know was about you or about me, but the world would know. The world would know and it would bear witness to the fact that I loved you.
Maybe?