Allow me to introduce myself. My name is John Illsley, but, before you get too excited at the prospect of a celebrity author, I must inform you that I am not and have never been the Bass Guitarist with Dire Straits and if you do not wish to be lumbered with a cynical octogenarian academic who writes intelligent erotic fiction to amuse his friends and colleagues, stop reading now. Otherwise, stay curious and read on, bearing in mind that because the Wattpad computer  has rightly designated my work  as mature and private you may have to follow me if you want to learn the nature of my game.