First Choice • George Weasley

4. Confessions

It was as if my entire body went numb and every nerve in my body was on fire all at the same time. I couldn't possibly describe the feeling of his lips on mine if I tried. 

After what felt like hours, our mouths slowly parted from each other, and the room fell silent. We just stared at each other for a moment, like we both needed a minute to process what had just happened. I brought my hand to my mouth, gently touching my lips already trying to remember the feeling. 

"I-I'm so sorry. Oh, God.. I'm so sorry, Paige. I shouldn't have done that." He stuttered, running his hands stressfully through his hair and then placing a hand over his mouth, avoiding eye contact with me. 

"W-why? I'm not." I choked out as he turned away from me. I followed him in the dark as he sat on the base of the steps with his eyes closed, his hand against his forehead. 

He didn't say anything, he just looked down with his head still in his hand. I crouched down in front of him to be at his level, and looked up at him.  

"Georgie.. Talk to me please." I reached up and slowly pulled his hand away from his face, and he gently looked down at me as I did so.

"I can't Paige. Not about this, I- I just can't." His voice was quivering and he was hesitating between looking down and looking at me. 

"Yes you can, look at me. Am I angry? Am I running away?" He shook his head, sheepishly looking into my eyes. "No, I'm not. I'm here, right in front of you. Pretty happy, actually." A spark of light lit up his face at my words, and the side of his lip curled into a slight smile.

"Really?" He whispered. I nodded, slowly intertwining my fingers with his.

"You have no idea how long I've waited for what just happened, George." I couldn't help but smile as I spoke, a slight sigh of relief escaping my mouth. "I just- I never, ever, thought it would actually happen." I stuttered, looking down. 

"Paige..." He said under his breath, gently pushing a piece of stray hair behind my ear. "How could you possibly think that?" There was a warmth and softness to his voice, and I melted at the combination of the sound and his touch. 

"I'm nothing George, nothing compared to what you could have. What you deserve." 

"Are you crazy? Paige I- I'm the one that doesn't deserve you." He said in a low voice, furrowing his brow as he squeezed my hand. 

"No George, that's ridi-"

"No it isn't. I've always seen you, I've always noticed you that way. Since the day I met you years ago. I've pushed and pushed any feelings I've had towards you down because you're just so... So perfect, Paige. Everything about you. Your smile, your eyes, the way you speak, how you carry yourself, just- just everything. I'm not deserving of it all." He paused, taking a deep breath. 

"I've always been second to Fred, my whole life. I love him more than anyone, really I do, but he's always gotten everything he wants. I guess I always assumed he'd get you too, so I stayed back. But last night- seeing you, it just made all those feelings flood back... And I didn't know what to do anymore." Part of me was still in shock at everything he was saying, but I let him continue as I stroked his hand gently with my thumb.

"After talking to you in the hall last night, I don't know, I just- I felt hopeful for the first time. That, maybe there was the slightest chance you felt the same. I could barely sleep, I just couldn't get you off my mind. And this morning at breakfast, I wanted to try something just to see, but I ruined it and scared you. I messed everything up." 

"Is that why you left?" I asked under my breath, trying to process everything he had said. He nodded slowly, watching my hand as it held his. 

"George, I wasn't scared. I was in shock." He looked back up at me, hanging on my words. "I've had feelings for you since the first day I met you, when we were kids. Last night, I was so flustered I could barely even talk, just looking at you. And this morning, when I felt you touch me, I was just caught off guard. I wasn't expecting it, at all. But I wasn't scared, I was excited... Happy." A smile spread across his gorgeous face, the moonlight hitting it perfectly as it flood the room through the window.