Safe Haven

Chapter Forty Six

"You're not touching me with those hands!" I flinch away from Jamie.

"Babe, you already made me wash them. Twice." She sighs.

"I don't care. You put your hand inside fish poop water."

"I put my hands in 'fish poop water' all the time! What do you think I do as Marine Science Major?" I shrug and she extends her hand. "It's not dirty."

I huff and stare at her. I push away the memories of her touching starfish, stingrays, and other animals inside interactable tanks, and hold her hand. I focus on her fingers interlocked with mine and the cool salty breeze blowing my hair as we walk around the pier.

"You know, I actually had never seen a seahorse giving birth live," she says. "It was very exciting."

"It's insane he had over a thousand babies inside of him." I wince. "But it was really cool."

"I'm glad I got to share that experience with you." She nudges my shoulder with hers and I smile.

She leads us in between a few shops and we get to the docks. We sit on a bench and I rest my head on Jamie's shoulder, looking at the boats, rocking with the slight movement of the water.

"Thank you for bringing me here," I say softly. "I really needed to unwind."

"Any time." She squeezes my hand. "You know I've got you, right? It doesn't matter when, where, how or why, you can count on me."

I close my eyes and take a deep breath. Those words warm me up inside and my heart gives a flutter. I pull myself closer and smile against her neck.

"I really appreciate that. And I hope you know I'm here for you too."

"I do." She presses a kiss on my forehead. "I just wish you would take things a little bit easier. I know it's your grade and you really care about it, but you have to take care of yourself."

I sigh and pull away. I run my free hand through my hair and look at the bay in front of us.

"I know that — I always have — but I can't take this for granted." My eyes meet the seagulls flying above us for a few seconds before I continue. "Both sides of my family struggled so much to get me to where I am today. When my grandparents decided to leave their countries and come here to have better opportunities and resources, they sacrificed too much for me not to take full advantage of the education I have at my disposal. Failing is not an option. It never was or ever will be.

"I've always worked so hard to get the best grades I could get. And even though I did go out with friends and all that, I know I could've taken it a bit easier, but I couldn't risk not being... perfect, I guess. The pride in my abuela's eyes with every A I got was enough to keep pushing me to take all I can get and make the most of it. I know how much she regrets not finishing high school, and I have the opportunity to attend one of the best universities in the world." I huff. "It's not fair, and I have to do right by them and what they sacrificed to get me here."

I keep my eyes on the water and Jamie pulls both my hands to hold in hers. When I don't look at her, she squeezes them lightly to catch my attention.

"I know you feel like this is what you have to do, like you owe it to them, but that's not true. You cannot put your health at risk just to get good grades. You'll spread yourself thin and end up hurting yourself badly." She pauses then whispers, "I don't want to see that. I care too much about you — and I know your family does too — to see you like that."

"I know," I say softly.

"If you can't take care of yourself right now, I'll do it. I'll help you get out of this bad cycle. You have to relax and enjoy life," she says then shakes my hands. "You're 20 years old, for fuck's sake!" I chuckle. "It's time for you to go to parties, make mistakes and questionable choices, learn new things, meet great people like me..." We both laugh and I rest my forehead against hers.

"To fall in love..." I say softly and hold my breath, waiting for her reaction.

Her hands leave mine and slide up my arms to push me back a little. I frown.

"What?" she whispers. Her eyes slightly widen and stare at me.

I hold her hands and look deep into her dark brown eyes. "I love you, Jamie."

"You do?"

"Yes."

She keeps looking at me, not moving or making a sound. But soon she grins so widely, I can't help but do the same.

"I love you too," she says softly against my lips before kissing me.