The Sharpest Lives.

Chapter 6: The Day I Left The Womb (Frank's POV)

As I followed Gerard downstairs I felt adrenaline pumping in my veins. What if Gerard’s parents were those kind of really uptight people who didn’t like piercings and tattoos? What if they looked bad at me? Man, I hated meeting new people, I was self-conscious as it was, no need for anyone to make it worse.

We entered the kitchen and there they were, his father sitting on the counter reading the newspaper and his mother moving around the kitchen making what I decided were pancakes.

‘’Mom, Dad. Mornin’. This is Frank’’

Their heads turned in my direction so fast I heard their necks crack, I swear to god. Mrs. Way then smiled with a smile so wide it occupied like half of her face and Mr. Way greeted me with a smaller one, but it was a warm smile. I felt relief taking place on my chest and breathed relaxed for once in my life.

‘’Well, how comes he has slept here tonight honey?’’

‘’He was feeling down so I thought I could be there for him and let him sleep here’’

‘’I hope that isn’t a problem, I’m sorry, Mrs. Way’’

‘’It’s fine, honey! I’m glad my Gee Bear has finally found someone to be around’’

I tried not to laugh at the nickname. Gee Bear was now blushing like a motherfucker and I was having the time of my life. We sat around the counter and Mrs Way served breakfast for everyone while we engaged in chitchat. Mr. Way was attacking me with a bunch of questions, most of them I couldn’t answer so I had to make lies up. Gerard probably realized and changed the subject to some asshole of a coworker that he didn’t like and like that I had the first real breakfast of my life in what seemed like a long time but was only a year. I missed my parents and I was jealous that Gerard and Mikey had them around and that they were obviously the cool kind of parents. My parents were cool too, I think that they would have gotten along just fine with Gee and his family.

When we finished breakfast, Gee, Mikey and I helped to clean up the kitchen and their mother was all smiles and giggles and thank you’s. When it was all done, I realized what I was doing. If someone caught me here, they would be in danger. The police had said that with my parents out of the picture, I was safe, but I didn’t think so. I had to be cautious all the time, and I was starting to get sick of it. I wanted to be able to have a life of my own but I didn’t want to put Gerard or his family in danger. That’s how I decided to go back to my house and stop talking to Gerard, it would be easier for me… and safer for him.

‘’Uh… Gee, I have to go back to my house’’

He pouted. Man, I would be here with him all day, playing video games and reading comics and just having a normal Sunday, but I couldn’t.

‘’Do you want to hang out later?’’

‘’Yeah, I’ll come back later’’

I lied. I lied like the asshole I was, but I hoped Gee would understand some day. I said my goodbyes to everyone and Gerard walked me to the door and then hugged me. I could feel his nervousness as he wrapped his arms around me and I felt bad for not speaking to him again, but it was better off that way.

‘’I’ve had a good time with you, Frankie’’

‘’Me too, Gee Bear’’

He blushed furiously and I blinked at him while walking away to the shithole I lived in. I saw Allison, my guardian, standing in the front porch with a raised eyebrow glancing at me. She was smoking and I couldn’t but compare how she did it all tacky and disgusting while Gerard had the capacity to make smoking look like sex, like art.

‘’Where have you been, short sack?’’

‘’I was out with a friend’’

‘’Well, the next time you could let me know or something, not that I care, but I don’t want the police all over me for some mistake you’ve made, understood?’’

‘’Yes, ma’am’’

She smacked the back of my head and I went straight to my room, trying to brush the feeling I had off my chest. I took Pansy (my guitar) from the floor and started playing a random melody while my thoughts drifted back to Gerard. I didn’t want to stay away from him, I didn’t want to stop being his friend. But it was the right thing to do, I couldn’t put another person in danger just for my own selfishness, just because I liked him.

I liked his bright red hair, I liked his ghost-pale legs and the way he moved his hands. I liked his voice and how he giggled. I liked that he liked comics and the same music I liked and I liked how he smoked. Damn, I fucking loved how he smoked. And I also liked him being safe and alive and me stepping into his life would probably ruin that.

I groaned and covered my face with my hands. Why was everything so difficult? Why did I have to be this complicated? The only thing I wanted was to be normal, to be able to have a life with Gerard in it. Fuck this shit already.

I made my way down to have dinner and made myself some pasta with Allison observing every move I made. I knew she didn’t like me and she knew I didn’t like her, but I tried to put up with her and she sometimes did the same.

‘’So who is this new friend, short sack?’’

‘’No one, I’m not seeing him again’’

‘’Why is that?’’

‘’I don’t want to put him in danger, Allison’’

‘’Please, stop being so full of yourself. No one is after you’’

‘’I can’t be sure of that and neither can you, so until we can be 100% sure, I’m not letting anyone around me’’

‘’As you wish, Frank. It’s your life’’

Seriously, I was already 19. Why did I have to have someone looking after me? I should be able to live alone, I didn’t mind if I got killed if that meant having a place of my own and not having to deal with Allison. And, if everyone was so sure that no one was after me, why was she here? The fuckers thought that I was stupid enough to not to see the truth. My parents were dead already and I had no one, why should I live? There was no one who cared about me at all.

And so, a day passed by. And then a week. I went to the diner, to the park and to the mall where Gerard worked in a stupid attempt to see him from the distance at least, but there was no sign of his outrageous red hair anywhere. I craved for him, I wanted to hear his voice once again and see him blowing the smoke from the side of his mouth, raising his head as he did it. I missed Gerard, and I didn’t miss anyone who weren’t my parents.

I decided to pay them a visit in the local cemetery, though their caskets were empty because they didn’t find their bodies, but at least they had a grave. I entered the place and it was empty, no one was around and the silence was overwhelming. I felt like home, and it made me sad. I had no one, not a single relative wanted to take care of me after what had happened to my parents. Not that I wanted for them to do so, but damn, at least it would have made me feel wanted, not a waste of space.

‘’Hey mom, dad’’

I arrived to their graves and sat down between the two of them, pretending that was another normal Sunday and we were sitting on the couch instead of sitting on a ground that hid a million corpses.

‘’I met someone. I think you would’ve liked him, he’s amazing. But I can’t be around him, because I would put him in danger and I don’t want anything bad for him. You know, when dad got involved in that shit, I thought one day I’d be able to have a life on my own. When you guys were gone, I wasn’t even close to think it was over.  I have this feeling all the time that someone is hunting me, that I am going to end up dead, like you guys. And if I become friends with Gerard, he is going to be in danger and I can’t let that happen, because guys, I like him so much and he has a lot to live for… anyways, he probably hates me by now…’’

‘’I don’t hate you, Frankie’’

I froze in the spot. I raised my head and there he was, a cigarette hanging from his lips and a hurt expression that clouded his beautiful hazel eyes. I tried to prepare myself for what was coming, but what he did exceeded all my expectations.