Whatever We Felt

Chapter 7// a trip down memory lane and sleepovers

•Katrina

"Katrina look what I found!" My mother came walking through the front door with a big brown box.

The boys were still over and basically we had weird jam out sessions to old songs.

She set the box on the living room floor and I immediately sat up on my knees and peered into the box.

"Woah," I breathed out.

It was full of photo albums of me before my cancer. My mom hid them so one day she would show me all my memories and old thing that meant a lot to me.

"I wanna see these!" Michael ran over and snatched a book from the box.

The 3 other boys repeated his actions.

"Oh my gosh," they all chorused as they stared intently at one picture in a book.

"What is it?" I laughed as I walked over to see what they were so interested in.

It was a picture of just me outside smiling. I was 12 in the picture. 7 months before I found out I had cancer.

I smiled. I missed my chocolate brown natural perfect curly hair that fell just above my belly button. My eyes were the same bold and mysterious green they always have been but they lost the sense of joy they always carried.

"What about it?" I asked laying on my stomach.

"Puberty didn't even have to be nice to you!" Calum pouted.

I laughed as I turned the page over. I felt tears rushing to my eyes as all my dance competition pictures flooded on the page.

"You were a dancer?" Luke asked.

"Mmmhmmm. I would practice in my basement for hours a day," I hummed.

I got off my stomach and looked into the box. I saw a small blue box and quickly picked it up.

I opened it and just as I remembered layed a ring with a crown on it. The small paper was what caught my eye. In my dads handwriting showed 'you will conquer all even if I'm not here to see it.'

"Boys why don't you just spend the night over here?" My mom asked as held a pile of blankets and pillows.

"Okay," they all agreed.

"Okay help me set up the living room then."

"Katrina I'm gonna get some fresh air, would you like to join?" Luke asked holding his hand out.

I clasped onto his hand and led him out to the backyard where we sat on the bench swing.

I leaned my head into his shoulder and didn't let go of our hands.

"Luke?"

"Yeah?"

"Are you scared?" I shifted my seat so I turned to face him.

"What do you mean?"

"You're scared. Scared of me," I looked down at my hand that was holding onto his.

He laughed and turned to face me.

"No. Not at all."

"You're lying," I mumbled.

"No I'm not!"

"You're scared. You're scared of my small cell lung cancer. You're scared I am going to die. You are. Don't deny it. You said so yourself," I felt tears well up in my eyes. Why was I even talking about this?

He sighed and squeezed my hand.

"Katrina, it scares me but to see that you're happy is all I need."