I Don't Trust Myself (Tommyinnit angst)

Chapter 2 - The Bridge

(a/n) hey! So I'm back for a little. This chapter is brought to you by my sleep deprivation, so please stick with me. Constructive criticism is very much appreciated! Good luck with this chapter. ;)

TW: ANXIETY, EATING DISORDERS, SELF HARM, BLOOD

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I woke up with a start, sitting up and peeling a worksheet of some sort away from my face. I looked around sporadically to see what woke me up. I watched my phone from across the room dinging. Walking over to the edge of my untouched bed, since my body decided to take a power nap on my desk for the night, I saw discord blowing up. 

I decided to power up my PC to what all the fuss was about, considering waiting for it to boot up will give me more time to wake up and a better probability to understanding exactly what everybody was saying. 

I scanned over the messages that had awakened me and it was just everyone bullshitting around. I was about to leave the group chat to climb into my bed when I noticed that they were all on a voice call. I reluctantly joined after seeing Tubbo saying something about me being online. I can't get out of this one, can I?

Upon first connecting, I heard people talking over one another. When my arrival was noticed, quiet filled each end of the call, leaving an unsettling feeling in my stomach. The previous feeling of excitement that had been in the call left quickly, leaving a lingering sense of seriousness and tension. Confusion washed over me, so naturally, I had to at least try to break some of the ice with a hearty, but painfully fake, laugh.

Wilbur was the first one to speak up, "Thomas, so glad you could join us." 

I immediately became anxious, as his statement was dripping in sarcasm.

"I, for one, think that Tommy would be very happy to hear what we have been planning," said Phil.

It took me a moment to process that they were speaking directly to me, being a bit groggy from just waking up to the horrid sound of discord. Only then did I think to look over, and actually take notice, to who was in the voice chat. The group consisted of Wilbur, Tubbo, Techno and Phil. 

Techno's voice shook me from my thoughts. "Tommy, you are probably wondering why we called you here. Well, we have a very serious matter to discuss...a meetup. What do you think?"

My first reaction was to exclaim happily, so I did. Then the actual responsible part of my brain took over and I decided to ask some logical questions.

"That sounds amazing! Did you guys come up with any information about when or where yet?" I asked, trying to not sound too eager.

"Yes, we were waiting to hear from you before we set anything in stone. But we would obviously meet somewhere near Brighton since Wil and Tubbo both live close to there and everyone would need green cards to visit Techno, so that's just illogical. We were thinking about meeting up sometime in the near month. I thought that Techno and I could rent an Airbnb or something like that so that we could stay near each other for a few days, even if we didn't all stay together." Phil explained. 

"Okay," I sighed, " that was a lot, I do not have the brain capacity to comprehend that in such little time. Anyways, I should be able to go and stay in a hotel room, depending on how my parents feel about me staying in an Airbnb with two men in their twenties and thirties, no offense." 

The call was littered with laughter and grunts of approval from different people in the call. 

"Is Tubbo going?" I wondered aloud. 

"Yeah," Tubbo answered, "my parents said I can meet up with you guys and I can stay with you guys if Tommy is. My parents also said that you can stay in the guest room at my house for a few nights, Tommy, if your parents feel more comfortable with that."