Some Day One Day (Maylor AU)

Chapter 98

Roger shrugged off Stewart's hand and drew his knees into his chest, wrapping his arms around his shins. "It's about everything. It's about all the shit that's happened since last year. It's about—"

Another gunshot rang through the air, this time louder and attracting both men's attention.

"What was that?" Roger whispered with wide, frightened eyes.

"Firecrackers, maybe?" Stewart guessed. "Someone dropping something?"

"You really think so?" the blonde questioned, shifting his gaze back to the drummer who seemed just as unsettled as him now.

"Yeah, I...I wouldn't worry about it," he replied, slowly lowering himself to the ground. The way his face scrunched up and the quick intake of air made it clear he regretted his decision, but nevertheless, he persisted. He wanted Roger to come back inside, partly because that alleyway posed a danger to both of them but mostly because he wanted to see the blonde do what he came to London for. Stewart meant it when he said that he wanted to set Roger free the first time they played together, but even he could see that something was holding him back. He just didn't know what that something was.

"So, you said a lot's happened since last year?" the drummer attempted to revive the conversation, breaking the weighted silence that overcame the pair.

Roger took a deep breath and let it out slowly, responding with a simple, "Yeah," and nothing more.

"Well, what happened?" Stewart pried, a genuine quality to his inquiry.

The blonde pressed his lips together and twiddled his thumbs, thinking of what he should say, or really, how he should say it. Roger had never been a fan of opening himself up to others. It was only around Tim that he had let his guard down, but as time went on, even he proved difficult to be vulnerable around. Roger had come to realize that Tim's interest in him was really interest in himself, listening only when his concerns pertained to him or their life together. Once he reached that understanding, he discovered it was easier to keep to himself. Everything he did became a secret, a truth shrouded in white lies. The only problem was that Tim saw right through them, knowing the blonde was holding something back from him. He just never knew what.

"Roger?" Stewart murmured, leaning forward to try and catch the guitarist's attention.

The blonde reluctantly met the drummer's gaze, seeing in his eyes the same interest that he noticed in Brian's when they first met. Before the professor, Roger hadn't had someone look at him like that in a long time, but even then, he couldn't bring himself to come clean. There was always something holding him back.

"Rog, come on," Stewart groaned, growing a bit frustrated. "I know something's bothering you, and I know it's going to keep bothering you and keep you from following your dreams if you don't tell me what's going on."

He bit his lip in an attempt to further push off the inevitable, but soon he gave in and begrudgingly disclosed, "I met someone." A bright shade of red painted his cheeks. "I met someone, and he...he messed everything up."

"How?"

Another bout of silence filled the conversation, eventually interrupted by the blonde's confession that, "He fell in love with me."

"And let me guess," Stewart smirked, "you fell in love with him too."

Roger glanced over at the drummer, resisting the pathetic smile that dared to tug at the corners of his lips. "I wasn't supposed to. I...I didn't want to. It was just meant to be something fun."

"Then what happened?"

The blonde dropped his head and explained, "Then I realized he needed me more than I needed him. He saw me as his out, and I guess I saw him as mine too, but..."

"But what?"

Roger remained quiet for a bit before replying softly, "But I'm not ready to leave everything behind." His eyes flickered up from the frosty pavement to Stewart's. "I'm not ready for everything to change. I thought I was, but—"

"You're scared," the drummer finished his sentence for him.

"Yeah," the blonde sighed.

A blanket of silence fell over the two men, Stewart wanting to ask Roger what he was afraid of but being denied the chance by the door bursting open—this time with Sting standing in the doorway.

"Hate to ruin the moment, boys," the bassist snarled, "but if we don't get our arses back in there right fucking now, they're going to bump us from the set list, and there's a fat chance we'll ever be able to play here again—or anywhere, for that matter."

Stewart turned his head toward Roger, the blonde doing the same. "What do you say, Rog? Will you come back inside? I promise you, there's nothing to be scared of in there. The worst that can happen is we play the show and have a good time."

"Uh, no," Sting interjected, "The worst that can happen is—"

"We play the show and have a good time," the drummer sternly repeated himself, glaring at his friend who rolled his eyes out of annoyance and crossed his arms. Stewart returned his attention to the guitarist and asked more kindly, "So, what do you think? You think you can come back inside?"

The blonde swallowed the nervous lump that formed in his throat, his gaze shifting between the two band members before darting to the end of the alleyway where a police car sped by with its sirens blaring. Roger and Stewart shot up from the ground, watching as another flew past the opening, followed by an ambulance. Something deep inside Roger drew him towards the street, as if those police cars and ambulance were calling for him, alerting him of something he should've been there for; something he could've prevented. However, the blonde was only allowed to take a few steps before Stewart's hand wrapped around his and pulled him inside.

With their hearts beating against their chests, the band took their places on the stage. Roger's hand trembled as he grabbed the guitar Stewart had lent him and draped it over his shoulders, looking back at the drummer through the shadows. A smirk crawled across his face as he winked at the blonde, raising his drumstick and hitting the hi-hat, giving them the beat that would kick-start their set.