Guns and Roses

Ch 37

"I'm just warning you, this man says some really offensive shit on purpose. Don't let it get under your skin. If I see you angry, I'll shoot him on Live TV." Luca said.

We arrived at the studio on time. We were going through some simple pampering, interviews, and free time.

There was a live audience, full of suspicious old white women.

I followed luca closeley, not feeling as comfortable as I felt on Wendy Williams.

"Welcome back luca." The man said, completely ignoring my presence.

I shrugged it off, seeing as I wasn't famous.

I sat on the couch, close to Luca.

They interviewed him as normal, completely ignoring my presence. I was starting to play with my nails when all of a sudden, I heard my name being mentioned.

"Astrid, you've seemed to turn up out of nowhere, all of his fans think you manipulated him for fame, and I kind of think it too. I mean, who likes black women?" The host said with a chuckle

Now I'm about to get disrespectful, I know this man did not just say that.

"Excuse me, joey, that is extremely disrespectful towards my fiancé" Luca said in a professional manner, knowing I was about to go off.

"I just wanted to know. Do you support Black Lives Matter?" Joey asked the both of us.

"Of course I do, it's stupid not to suppport a cause of equality." Luca said.

"Why wouldn't I? I'm a black life and I surely think I matter." I said.

"You didn't think you mattered when you tried to commit suicide." Joey said.

I froze.

How the hell did he know that?

The crowd gasped.

"According to your wrist, and your very public Instagram page, you were in the hospital for a couple days from a suicide attempt. Your so pathetic, saying that your life matters when you don't even think that." Joey said.

Tears flooded my eyes.

Luca put his hand on my knee, reframing me from getting up and going crazy.

Why the fuck isn't he saying anything? Why isn't he defending me?

"You seem like the ghetto black girl type astrid, and we can see that you are right here on this screen." Joey said.

The famous video of me and morgan getting into that fight showed up.

"How come fighting, when it comes to a person of color, is always ghetto, but when white people fight, it's shown as a disagreement." I spat.

The crowd gasped.

"Now your being racist to me. Black people these days I swear. I cant believe Luca chose to be with one of you people."

My breaths got shakier and shakier. I was starting to lose air. I needed to get out, I needed to go home.

I couldn't take it anymore.

I ripped Luca's hand away from me and lunged at Joey. I scratched his eye, took my shoes off, and hit him.

Luca pulled me off of him harshly and ran off stage. My hair was a mess, my shoe was gon, and my dress was rising up.

By now I was having a full blown panic attack, and Lucas firm grip on me wasn't helping me.

We ran out to the driver and he placed me in the car, making it even harder for me to breathe.

Luckily, the driver took note of my state and sped up.

We made it to the penthouse and I immediately ran to the bathroom and collapsed on the floor. I needed to calm myself down.

I splashed cold water from the sink onto my face and spread my arms and legs out.

I completely didn't notice that the door was being open and I was met with a sympathetic Luca Gastano.

"Why didn't you defend me Luca."

"Because, I know if I did, he would be dead in front of live TV. We're taking care of him right now. He'll be dead within 13 hours ,I promise." He said, laying on the floor with me.

"I wanna go home. I wannna go home right now." I said.

"I know, we're gonna be on the first flight in the morning, you need rest before your put into a flight situation. Everything's gonna be okay. "

It was pure silence for what seemed like hours. Just me and him, on the old marble floor, staring at the lit chandelier. I had calmed down extremely and the cold floor started to get warm under my body.

"Why'd you try to kill yourself." He blurted out.

I could tell he immediately regretted his words right after they came out.

"Colton. He used to abuse and assault me, I thought I couldn't get out, so I tried to kill myself." I said, saving him from the sappy ass details.

I sat up and saw that his jaw was clenched.

"I'll kill him if he ever tries to contact you again. Why are you talking to the person that abused you, and almost made you die astrid. I don't care if you forgave him, that's opening up wounds that I assume are close to being healed. Block him, for yourself." He scolded.

I knew in my heart that he was 100 percent right. I guess I was just talking to him to rub it in his face that I had better than him.

Excuse my toxicity.

I took my phone out and blocked him on everything. Luca gave me an approving nod and we took a steamy shower together.

He washed me, and I washed him. It wasn't anything sexual, but there was a thick tension.

We made our way to bed, with Luca grabbing tons of snacks for a relaxing movie night. He really knows how to make me feel better.

The interview was still heavy on my heart. How could a person literally say those things. Especially to a person of color like me.

I looked over to Luca, and saw him laughing at the movie we put on. I would've imagined him to not be so sympathetic towards me, but it's been that way lately.

Maybe getting married was in my best interest at this point. I know I sound crazy, but I would rather this than a boring life in my hometown.

I'm really conflicted right now.

Words- 1111

A/N- nothing to do with story.

I just wanted to say in general to all my people experiencing tough times right now, you'll get through it, I promise. Wether it's a heartbreak or something little that put you into a spiral of depression, you always have someone to talk to. Whether that be me, a complete stranger, or someone close to you.

You matter

Your worth something here on this messed up earth.

If you ever need to talk, my dms are always open, I'll always reply.

Instagram- india._.rose

Snapchat- prettycupcake_4 (don't judge I made it in 5th grade 😂

Tik tok- cokedupbrat, but my dms don't work, I'll sort them out.

Just know you are all loved, follow your heart, if that person is treating you wrong, don't put up with that, dump they ass.