Chapter 8: Fucking Up My Emotions...

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Right now, you know what I'm thinking? About my ex-boyfriend....
I broke up with him cause I thought he was liking other girls, and I was like ok that's cool, I'll let you be free, be free, be free....kinda thing right? Well now I feel like I still have feelings for him....but I don't know if it's like, 'dude OMG I still like you' or like a 'OMG dude I admire your personality' type if thing. Cause what I just realized while contemplating this is that, what is the difference between admiration and love? Like really. You come to love someone because you love who they are as a person....it's like I know I shouldn't get back together with him, cause that would be unfair to both of us, but like. The unknown of like following through, like with opening my heart...which I didn't really do, cause it was my first boyfriend and I was scared my feeling would be hurt, so I put up a wall....anyways just wanted to vent and say FUCKING SHIT IM MESSED UP. Anyways YEAH....so that's that, Peace.

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