𝟑𝟎 𝐃𝐀𝐘𝐒 | semishira!

𝐃𝐚𝐲 𝟏𝟔.

Letting go of someone is hard. How do people seem to do it so easily? How am I not supposed to look at my phone in the middle of the night, knowing the person I love is gone? I can't call them in the middle of the night and cry. When does the pain fade? When are we no longer dancing alone?

"Who are you going to the school dance with?" Tendo asks, placing his hands on the back of the chair he is sitting on. He rests his cheek on his hands and gives me a small smile.

"I don't think I'm going to go," I admit. "I don't have anyone to go with."

"You have to! Ushijima is taking his girlfriend so we can go together!" 

"I can't even dance..." I stare at my feet, unable to face Tendo. My heart races slightly in my chest. I want to ask him, but I'm pretty sure he will reject me. All he sees is Ushijima, anyways. 

"Come on! We can go together!" The red head exclaims. 

"Really?" I look up at Tendo, who has left his chair and is standing right in front of me. He smiles, and a paper floats off of his desk. We sit together in an empty classroom, just the two of us. 

"I'll teach you how to dance!" he reaches out a hand and clasps it in mine. We are both alone in an empty classroom, sitting in our school uniforms. He pulls me up out of my chair and takes both of my hands. 

"Wha-"

"Here!" he exclaims, taking his phone and putting on a playlist. The music starts to play and he takes my hands again. "Okay, so take your left hand and put it on my shoulder- yes! Like that!" My hand fits snugly on his shoulder blade. He places his right hand around my waist and takes my other hand with his. 

"What song is this?" I ask as we start to sway together slowly. 

"Daddy Issues by The Neighbourhood."

"What's The Neighbourhood?"

"The best band in existence, you should really listen to them more!" We sway slowly together at first in the empty classroom, the light filtering through the window softly. Tendo then spins me around. As I slowly turn, I knock over a stack of papers, causing Tendo to chuckle. I laugh too. It's perfect, it's all so perfect. 

But he doesn't see me the way I see him

-end of Semi chapter (you'll see what I mean in the next chapter)- 

  ❝Day 16❞
─30 Days
━━⋆⋅°✧⋅━━━┫⋅✩⋅┣━━━⋅✧°⋅⋆━━
1:05 ───⊙─────── 3:58
↻ ◁ II ▷ ↺
playιng: Yoko Ono -Mob Rich
volυмe : ▁▂▃▄▅▆▇▉

Weekends with Shirabu are the nicest. No school, no practice, just the two of us. 

"I can't believe this is only our second weekend together," I smile at Shirabu, sipping an energy drink. We are sitting on my couch in the living room, entangled in a blanket while watching a movie. It's dark outside, and my family is asleep upstairs. I check the time. 

"One in the morning, huh," he sighs. 

"Happy Sunday!" I laugh. The weight in my chest from earlier is still heavy in my chest, but it's better than it used to be. Shirabu makes everything better. 

"I'm not tired at all," I laugh, pausing the movie. 

"What are you doing?" 

"Everyone's asleep~"

"And?"

"I wanna do something with you, Kenjiro~" 

"Oh fuck no we are not-"

"It's not sex, idiot!"

"You were being really suggestive!" he pulls the blanket over my face. I shove him down and laugh quietly. My hand finds my phone and it automatically connects to my playlist. I hit play, and music starts to play in the background. The blanket falls off my face. "Is this-"

"Shhh," I say softly, putting a single finger on Shirabu's lips. 

God he's so hot in my shirt

Shirabu sits on his knees in my oversized, gray shirt and black sweatpants. He glares at me as I move the coffee table out of the way. I pull him off the couch. 

"What playlist is this?! This music-"

"Just vibe with me, Shirabitch~" I sway in my black tank top and  dark gray shorts to the music. The music is soft but gives off a suggestive vibe. I snap my fingers t the beat.

"I dunno, Semi-automatic, I don't think we should be doing this."

"Just dance with me and stop being a Shiradick," I whisper into his ear. "Let's just forget about yesterday~"

"I mean I kinda wanna," he whispers back, looking into my eyes. A small smile forms across his lips as I continue dancing in front of him. 

"Oh shit, I forgot you hate fun though- so maybe- we can just resume the movie and-" Shirabu presses a finger to my lips and starts bouncing his feet lightly to the beat of the song.

"I can feel this," he murmurs as he shifts his weight from side to side. The song shifts to the next one and I start to rock my head back and forth. I snap to the beat and move in circles around Shirabu. 

"Come on, crooked bangs~" I say softly. He moves his arms to the rhythm and a wide smile cracks upon his face. We move around the room for a few seconds, then stare at each other when our bodies are facing once more. I move closer in as we dance, my shoulder's moving side to side, as I get closer to Shirabu. Our shoulders touch and move to the beat together. My lips brush his forehead and he closes his eyes. I dip my face closer and he looks up at me with his longing chocolate colored eyes. Our lips touch.

Almost

Just as our lips are about to brush against each other, he takes a step back and frowns. 

"What are you doing?" Shirabu demands. 

"I ju- n-nothing I'm dancing!" Shirabu folds his arms and looks me up and down. 

"We talked about this," he sighs, "no kissing until you've been clean for a week" Shirabu tries to push me away, but I pull him into a hug, his feet lifting off the ground. I sway with him in my arms. "Semi-"

"At least let me hug you, okay? It's weird wanting to kiss you and- and not being able to. it's weird catching feelings again and falling in love-"

Shit

Did I just say...

Falling in love?

"S-Semi-"

"Forget that last part," I whisper, setting Shirabu down. 

"Semi-"

"Shirabu I said forget it!" I hiss. 

It's too soon to fall in love again

I move the coffee table back and sit on the couch, resuming the movie. Shirabu leans in to sit next to me. I don't push him away, but something inside me aches to push him to the other side of the couch. It's too soon, way too soon. But if it's too soon, why am I feeling like this? When Shirabu falls asleep, I set him on the other side of the couch and walk to the bathroom.

"I just need to think," I whisper to myself as I sit on the cold tile. 

"I can't- I can't fall in love again. I can't risk anyone leaving me..."

So why does my heart say yes?