𝟑𝟎 𝐃𝐀𝐘𝐒 | semishira!

𝐃𝐚𝐲 𝟒.

Tendo told me everybody has a home. He told me home wasn't a place, it was a person or thing. Maybe it was a house, but not for many. Home wasn't a house for broken people. Home was a place where you felt safe. He told me I was his home. I was his home and I left him alone. I'm not a very good home, am I? Tendo was my home, but after I left him, he left me too. So what is my home?

"So, Shirabutt, wanna go next?" I offered. Shirabu rolled his eyes.

"Stop calling me that, and sure." Ironically, the bottle landed on me. "Truth or dare?"

"Dare," I replied. 

"I dare you to stop calling me nicknames." I laughed and rolled my eyes. 

"Vodka, please," I called, taking a shot from the glass. Shirabu pouted.

"Cute," I winked. The room was fuzzy and I had no Idea what I was even saying, breathing in the weed made everything a light fuzz. Tendo put his knees in his hoodie, looking extremely uncomfortable. His eyes wavered to the marijuana on the other side of the room. Reon spun the bottle next. Tendo got up and took some weed, lighting the cigarette. 

"Smoking already?" Kawanishi observed.

"Yeah," Tendo replied. He huffed out smoke, avoiding eye contact with everyone .I tried to ignore the guilt welling inside me. Reon had landed on Goshiki, another boring person when it came to truth or dare.

"Truth or dare?" Reon asked.

"Truth," Goshiki replied, "I'm too scared for a crazy dare like the other guys."

"Hm...." Reon said, "who do you like?" Goshiki's cheeks flushed. The other boys ooed.

"You can decline," Ushijima offered.

"It's fine," Goshiki said. I watched Tendo wince from the other side of the room. "I'm not that much of a wimp. I...like Ushi..." The other boys were taken aback. Tendo inhaled the drugs once more and focused his attention away from Ushijima and Goshiki.

'Nobody needs to know' the words I heard Ushijima say rang in my head over and over. I felt like a dick for ever putting Tendo in this situation.

  Goshiki buried his face in his hands innocently. Tendo must have felt like he wanted to die. The red head slumped on the wall, looking empty. Ushijima spun the bottle. It landed on Goshiki. Again. Tendo shut his eyes closed, sweat dripping down his face. He looked so uncomfortable, so upset, and it was all my fault. 

"Truth or dare?" Ushijima asked.

"Dare..." Goshiki replied.

"Date me?" Ushijima asked. Tendo passed out.

❝Day 4❞
─30 Days
━━⋆⋅°✧⋅━━━┫⋅✩⋅┣━━━⋅✧°⋅⋆━━
1:05 ───⊙─────── 3:58
↻ ◁ II ▷ ↺
playιng: Comfort Crowd -Conan Gray
volυмe : ▁▂▃▄▅▆▇▉

Home isn't safe.

Home is never safe

I don't even have a home

Nowhere is safe

I sat in my bed with the lights off. It had been a few hours since I got home. And since then, I had locked myself in my room. 40 missed calls from Shirabu took up my notifications. I blasted Mother Mother at full volume. Anything to drown out the sound of my parents yelling at each other was good. 

An hour earlier, I had arrived at my house after a text from my mom that threatened to call the police if I didn't show up. My parents were worried sick about me, apparently. My dad yelled at me. My mom lost her composure, leaving a red mark on my face. I didn't even get a chance to speak because my dad started yelling at her. I went up to my room, and they didn't even notice. I had been held up in my room for a while since, trying to keep it all together. 

"Eita?" A quiet voice asked from outside. I opened my door to find my younger sister outside, tears brimming the edge of her eyes. 

"Mina?" 

"Eita please tell me it's not true," she sobbed, pulling me into a hug. I found it surprising when she sprung it upon me. Mina hadn't hugged me since she was eleven, and she was thirteen now. Mina and I were close when we were younger, but not anymore. My parents decided to stop pushing our relationship and eventually we grew distant. 

"What's not true...?"

"Goshiki told me," she sobbed, "please don't tell me you tried to...to..." 

"Mina..." I stood still while she gripped me tightly. 

"Was it my...fault?" 

"Why would it be?" I croaked, stroking her hair softly. "No, it's not you. You didn't do anything..."

"You went missing for three days, Eita. Three days...you usually only leave for a day sometimes, and you tell Mom and Dad exactly where you're going and-"

"I was at a teammate's house...I just needed a break..."

"Mom and Dad are discussing taking you to a hospital-"

"I need twenty-six days before you guys talk about that...just give me twenty-six days.."

timeskip- a few hours

My parents and I had a long talk. Apparently they found out about my attempt and weren't pleased.

"Why would you even get with someone like that?" my mom asked. 

"I...I don't know..."

"Are you trying to rip apart our family? Why would you try and jump off a building like that?!"

"I..."

"Do you want to go to hell?"

"Do you want to ruin our lives?"

"Guys..."

"YOU CAN'T JUST RUN AWAY FROM YOUR PROBLEMS LIKE THAT!"

I left. I left the table, went upstairs, and locked my bedroom door. I could hear their yelling from downstairs. It was all so loud. While I sat on my bed and cried, SHirabu called me once more. I hit decline. My dog, Poppy crawled up to me and liked my face. I pet her softly. She was the only thing that kept me sane at times. He fur was golden and soft, rifling while I ran my fingers through it. Another call. Eventually, I picked up.

"Are you okay, Semi?"

"...I'm alive so..." 

"Are you crying?" My parents yelled again downstairs. "Oh...I can hear them..."

"It's fine," I sighed, continuing to pet Poppy. 

"It's gonna be okay," Shirabu said. "You should get to sleep, it's late." 

"It's only eleven."

"Still...do you want me to stay on call with you as you go to sleep?" 

"I guess..." I replied, climbing into the covers. Poppy curled up next to me and licked my nose. 

"Just close your eyes," Shirabu instructed. "Put headphones in so my voice in breathing are all you can hear." I obeyed the peach-blonde and plugged my headphones in. "Good. Now breathe in. One, two three. Out. One, two three." We repeated this a few times until my crying came to a halt. "Now I'm going to tell you about something really boring and you are going to sleep..."

"Sounds like a plan," I mumbled, moving the phone closer to me. 

Shirabu's voice was calming

I was asleep before I knew it

Shirabu never hung up