I would never want to compare myself with other people whom have been through worse, but I have had my share of life changing hell that has led me to not wanting to be here. for example; the loss of my father at age five. Yes, I may have been too young to remember, but trust me when I tell you I REMEMBER. Jk Jk I have tiny memories of my dad. like he made me the book lover I am today. That man used to beat my ass for spelling words wrong. oh man, that bamboo stick was my closest friend. Every word I got wrong I'd get an ass whooping. all I can say is that his methods work. I've never failed an English exam, I speak proper English and I'm a book worm.
At this age, I'd always like to think my dad is somewhat proud of my success, but not too happy that I wanna join him so soon. His death really affected my grand mom, but she's just like me (or visa versa) she keeps her emotion in a jar, inside of a concrete box, inside of melted gold, behind an electric- you get the point. She-s emotionless toward anything and anyone, but I know shes hurting, I feel her pain. Would you believe I'm crying while writing this? I'm surprised I still have this feeling..... Well if I'm going to reach you guys, guess I gotta put emotion right? no problem xD.
