Love & pain

part 1

My name is y/n. I lived in wall rose. I joined scout regiment after Erwin. So yes im not a minor :D. Erwin was not a commander yet when i joined the scout.

After few months later, I'm in Erwin's squad because of my talent. I am as stronger as levi since I can't get hurt because I have this quick healing power. Tbh, I dont even know where this power came from.

I don't have parents since the day i was born. I was adopted by this auntie and i called her mom. So the power that i got is basically unknown and my true identity is unknown as well.

I can't die. My wounds would recover quickly in a blink of eyes. I'm tired.

.....

"You never smile don't you?" Petra asked me. I used to smile when i was young but after seeing deaths and titans and knowing i can't die it really stressed me out. Basically i'm numb.

"What do you want?" I asked. We're in a dining hall. "Nothing. Why? I can't talk to you now?"

"Yea sure sure go ahead and talk tree lover"

"Wha- what do you mean by that?"

I continue eat my bread quietly. I saw Erwin coming into the dining hall and i look at him. Damn, he's hot.

"Ah! That's your captain there. Is he going to join us?" Petra is teasing me. She knows that i have a crush on Erwin. I knock her head and continue eating my bread.

"Can i sit here?" Erwin asked. "Sure~" petra respond while elbowing me ( a/n: im sorry I  cant explain)

I look at him while he's eating. Damn, i like him, no, i love him. I want to protect him. Then levi came.

Ugh.

"Sorry levi the table's full" i said to him. He rolled his eyes and sit beside erwin. Bruh, i hate this man. Erwin is way better than you short ass.

......

We went out for an operation again. Commander Keith is in a charge of course. I'm in erwin's squad doing our duties.

I looked out for erwin most of the time.

"Captain Erwin!" A titan showed up in front of us. He take a turn and ran into the big forest we just followed him without asking.

Suddenly a titan grabbed Erwin.

"Erwin!!" I screamed. I stood up on a horse and use my ODM gear to kill the titan.

"Give him back, ugly." I sliced its nape and it fell onto the ground. Erwin is still in the titan's hand. I immediately run towards him.

"I'm fine." Said erwin. "Oi! Another titans!" "Behind you!" I immediately use the rope of my gear and kill all of those titans.

Erwin slowly standing up and help me . All of my teammate did. Suddenly, this ugly sad looking ass titan grabbed me and move its hand into its mouth.

"Tch, not today ugly." I sliced its hand and fly again and then sliced its nape.

"Back to your horses!" Erwin's command. We immediately run back to our horses and go back to the walls.

"We need to assemble with other squads, right now!" I look back at my squad, all of them were saved, no one's dead yet. Thank god.

"Erwin, you're not hurt right?" I'm worried that titan might grab him so tight and it might crush his bones.
"I'm fine, y/n. Thank you, for saving me." He smiled at me. I blushed so hard. This is the first time he smile at me. And thanked me. God damn finally.

I've been saving his ass since day 1. I deserve a thank you. Minutes later we gathered with other squads. Bad news , most of them died and many were injured.

Commander keith looks so stressed and everyone's had a gloomy face. We immediately fall back to walls.

We arrived. Every villagers gather around to look at us. Some had a worry face, some had a disgusted face.

"They're the only ones who made it back?"

"Everyone else must have gotten eaten."

"That's what they get for going outside of the walls"

I looked at erwin's face then i saw a boy and a girl smiling proudly behind the villagers. "What is he smiling for?" I whispered. Erwin might've heard me and look at me from his left then turn his head to his right to see that little boy smiling. He immediately turn his head to the front and changed his expression from sadness to sternness. The little boy's smile fade away as he saw other injured soldiers.

"Moses! Moses!"

"Excuse me, I dont see my son,moses here." An old lady came to commander keith and asked about her son. She grabbed commander keith's dark green cape. " Do you know where he is?"

"This is Moses's mother, go and get it." Said commander to one of the soldier beside him. An old lady look so worried and confused. Poor her. They took moses's hand and gave it to his mother. The hand was covered up with cloth. As she open the cover she was so shocked and cried.

"It's all we could retrieve."

"But my son... He was helpful right?" Asked old lady while crying. Commander were speechless. "Even if he couldn't achieve anything directly,surely my son's death helped humanity fight back right?!"

"Of course! No. During this latest mission, we...no. just like the other missions, we didn't achieve anything at all!!"

"We haven't found anything about them!" Said commander as he kneel down in front of that old lady.

After that, we continue to walk back to our place. Ha... This is a cruel world we're living...