Letters // larry a.u.

twelve

Thank you so much for 500 reads ! so so much love xx Hope you enjoy this chapter :') 

ALSO v v sorry about the wait but I like my chapters more to be nice and written patiently than in a rush because the results are better. So sorry and thank you for waiting x 

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"I just wish he would understand. You know? Understand how much the thought of my mother killing herself because of me, has effected me. How many pieces you had to pick up after me, how much pain I went through. How much thought I have given to dying at that time." Louis spoke to niall, with beer in both of their hands, on the couch. 

"Lou, louis. I've seen you get better, so much better since then. I've seen you in every state of being there is, and hell lou, you're so damn strong." Niall said, meaning each word. Tears were starting to fill his eyes because the thought of his best friend going into that dark hole again hurt him. He couldn't see louis going through that again. 

"Thanks niall, but mostly because of you. You've always been there for me, whenever I would call you, you would be here. And you've been such an amazing best friend. I cannot be more thankful for you niall."

"Thanks lad, you've done the same as well." Niall said putting the beer down and opening up his arms to hug louis. 

Just before louis could ask niall if he wanted more beer, the door opened and louis turned around to see harry standing there, looking as frantic as ever.

"Harry?"

"Oh jesus louis tomlinson." He breathes and practically sprints to the couch.

Immediately he hugs louis and kisses him on the lips, hair, cheeks everywhere he can.

"Harr-" Harry kisses him again.

"Harry Styles!" Louis finally manages to speak. 

"What?" He says and keeps looking at louis dreamily. 

"What has gotten into you my love?" Says louis, absentmindedly using a pet name. 

"Wait hold up, kissing? my love? Louis!" Niall yells and shakes louis' shoulders. 

"Hey hey, let's all just back up a bit yeah? Harry you go first." Harry moved to sit beside louis on the left side and niall on the right. 

"Well, niall texted me that you didn't feel well. I came back as fast as I could, school was being annoying as usual," harry took a breath, "Are you okay though lou? What happened?" Harry looked concerned and louis was glad, so glad he actually had someone like harry and niall beside him. 

"My, uh, my father came by." Louis managed to stutter out. 

"Oh. And that is bad because?" Harry asked, with no knowledge of what has been going on with louis and his family. 

"Hey um, lou. I'm going to go yeah? Nice seeing you harry." Niall exclaims and mouths a 'call me later' and leaves louis' house. 

Louis didn't want to explain to harry about his situation because he himself hated it, he hated everything that has happened between his family. 

So louis lays down on the couch and harry immediately positions himself on top of him, to stare intently into louis' eyes. 

"My mother passed away when I was 14," He takes a big gulp of breath and harry looks at him as if he has lost track of time and louis was the only thing that could direct him to that, "My dad blamed her death on me, she killed herself and my father said that it was all my fault and that I drew her to that kind of pain. So I lived through to pain of thinking that everything was my fault for, well until now, and sometimes I still think it's my fault." Louis decided to stop there for a moment because so many horrible memories were coming back to him and he didn't want them in his head.