"I'm sorry"

09

I walked back into the recruitment office after my not so pleasant conversation with Rose and Bucky. They take me back to the check-up portion of my ever so wanted enlistment. The doctor ran a few test and then took my blood pressure. I was worried they were gonna find out that I lied on my enlistment form. The doctor ripped off the blood pressure cup off my arm.

"You can get dressed now." he said just loud enough so I could hear. 

A nurse then entered the room and whispered to the doctor, who then turned to eye me. It had me on edge.

"Wait here." the doctor said.

"Am I in trouble?" I said as the fear rose in my chest.

"Just wait here." he said as he and the nurse left.

I looked over to a poster:

IT IS ILLEGAL TO FALSIFY YOUR ENLISTMENT  FORM

"I'm in trouble." I said quietly as I quickly pulled on my shoes. A doctor then entered, looking at a file. My file.

"So, you want to go over seas, kill some Nazis?" he said in a thick German accent. 

"Excuse me?" I said confused.

"I'm Doctor Abraham Erskine. I represent the Strategic Scientific Reserve." he said as he held out his hand for me to shake. I gladly grabbed his hand and shook it while saying, "Steve Rodgers. Where are you from?"

"Queens, 73rd and Utopia Parkway. And before that, Germany. This troubles you?" he answered politely while also asking a question of his own. "And where are you from, Mr. Rodgers? Is it New Haven, or Paramus. Five exams. In five different cities." he continued on.

"That might not be the right file-" I started to say, but he cut me off.

"It isn't the exams I'm interested in. It is the five tries." he looked at me before continuing with, "You didn't answer my question. You want to kill Nazis?" 

"Is this a test?" I asked with shock in my voice.

"Yes." he said calmly while taking another look at my file.

"I don't want to kill anyone. I don't like bullies. I don't care where they are from." I said with confidence in my voice.

"There are already so many big men fighting this war. Maybe what we need now is a little guy. I can offer you a chance, only a chance." he said as he was walked out of my curtained off area.

"I'll take it." I said with excitement.

"Good." he stopped for a second. "So, where is the little guy from, actually?" he said as he pulled out a pen from his pocket.

"Brooklyn." I said. he started to write it down and then pulled out a stamp and he stamped my paper. I had finally been accepted into the army.

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"He looks up to you Buck, that's why he wants to enlist. he wants to be like you." I said calmly as me and Bucky walked around the expo before we finally decided to leave.

"I know. I just don't want him to go. Someone's gonna need to be here to take care of you. If I-" Bucky started to say before I cut him off.

"Don't you dare say it Buck." I said as I started to feel tears roll down my cheek.

"Rose, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you. I won't say it-" He said calmly but then got interrupted by a gasping Steve. 

"Steve! Oh my, what happened!?" I screamed as he ran towards us. he didn't seem hurt but I always made sure to check.

"I got enlisted. Bucky I did it!" Steve screamed as he continued to run towards us. I held back some tears at the sound of the words he said. 

"Really?" Bucky questioned.

"Ya, I leave next week." Steve said. I'd be leaving around the same time as him so I had time to spend with him. I was still worried but I pushed it aside. Steve had agreed to go to diner with us, so we got on our way. We walked for about 10 minutes before getting to the diner Bucky loves. We sat down and ate and headed towards Steve's house to drop him off.

"Be careful Bucky." Steve said softly. He knew Bucky was leaving tomorrow, he just couldn't believe it.

"I will Steve. Don't worry about me. Just worry about her, Ok?" Bucky said. I wasn't trying to listen to their conversation but I was near them.

"Bucky, she'll be fine without you." Steve said. He was trying to explain to Bucky I would be ok but he still worried about me.

"I know, I'm just worried I won't come back to her." Bucky said. I hated hearing those words come out of his mouth.

"She has that job with Stark dude. She'll be ok. She'll make friends. I'm gonna go. Let you spend some time with Rose before you leave." Steve said as he gave Bucky a hug and then walked into his house.

Bucky returned the hug. After Steve walked into his house I pulled him into a tight hug. Finally letting my tears out. He comforted me and gave me a long, much needed kiss. We walked home and put on a movie when we got inside. I snuggled up onto him on the couch. I wanted to enjoy this moment.

"I love you doll." Bucky said softly.

"I love you too." I said before leaning in and giving him a passionate kiss. After the movie was over he picked me up and took me to our room. He laid me down on the bed and climbed in and snuggled back up to me. I laid my head onto his chest and let out a sigh as I closed my eyes. He leaned down and gave me a kiss on the forehead. I quickly fell asleep.

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I couldn't help but think this would be the last time I held her in my arms as she slept. The last time I would get to watch her sleep peacefully. I was hoping that wasn't the case but there was always a chance you wouldn't come home. I silently watched her sleep before I slowly drifted off as well.