ABSOLUTELY POG {tommyinnit}

{thirtyseven}

[tw: mention of not eating, will be a reoccurring theme for the next few chapters ]

***

The days seemed to merge into one she wouldn't have know if it had been two days or two weeks at this point. Savana constantly found herself following the same schedule everyday.

Talk to Drista when she wakes up if she had even slept the previous night, lie to dream and sapnap that she did actually eat her food and that it wasn't in the trash can next to her bed that she disposed of when they all slept.

Check twitter, read the hate comments. Ignore the text, ignore the calls, ignore the whole world. Shut anything and everything out so nothing could hurt her, or care for her.

If she had the energy she would even let a few tears slip from her eyes, or even a muffled scream into her pillow.

Her hair was in knotted clumps that sat in a bun atop her head, but only when she chose to put it up, other times she wouldn't even leave bed to have to worry about her appearance.

Her eyes were bloodshot, the skin around them was always puffy, and her eye bags were the deepest shade of purple she had ever seen.

The same sweater wrapped around her body from the day it all happened. It was the only thing that she felt comfortable in.

But today when her eyes strayed open, Drista was already prompted at the end of her bed. "I know you haven't been eating," she whispered. Savana ignored her comment and pressed her head into the pillow.

"Savana I know you aren't okay and I know it's difficult but please don't make your self suffer any more than you are," This time Savana looked up at her.

"I have been eating, I eat everytime they bring me a meal, why do you think the plate returns empty?" her defensive shield took over and she watched as Dristas green eyes widened.

"I'm not an idiot Savana," the girl huffed, her hands at her chest. "I have been eating," Savana didn't budge as she looked into her eyes.

"I'm only trying to help," Drista muttered. "Maybe I don't need help, i'm perfectly okay," she pushed the feeling of guilt deep into her chest, it made her heart rate pick up as she looked over at Drista.

She pushed her blond locks over her shoulder as she exited the room, closing the door behind her. Savana punched the bed sheets next to her, letting out her frustrations. "Shit!" she shouted into her pillow muffling the sound.

She felt herself break a little more as she pushed Drista away. Her brother was the one person she couldn't bring herself to talk to.

As she brought out her plastic bag full of food from the previous days she walked past the kitchen, she noticed locks on cabinets, ones that held things that made her shudder.

But walking past she could almost hear the wine beg for her, she would shake her head clear. Never would she let herself stoop that low again. Sapnap had seen her at her worst and she never wanted him to have to see that again.

Her phone was flooded with messages, not just from Tommy. Techno constantly texted her. Tubbo even more worried after their last interaction. Grayson constantly texted her, called a few times as well.

If she felt up to it, she would open the messages, even write out a response but never send it.

Ranboos calls seemed to increase as the days went on. His text as well, pushing people away was the only way she knew how to cope.

If no ones around, you can't hurt them right?

***

Tommy sent another message. His fingers tattered against his phone. It had been only three days, but the weight on him felt like it had been way more than that.