fame || jack wright

Chapter 17: Processing

Sophia POV

I sigh tiredly, smiling towards Kouvr who waves at me as I walk into the living room, newly changed into pajamas. I enter just in time to hear Thomas say, "I mean it went well all in all, nothings broken and no one died," making me laugh, calling attention to myself,

"Par for the course for a Tiktoker party," Everyone chuckles and I see Jack and Chase in one of the couches, moving towards them.

"Honestly I had fun, it was chill," Dixie calls excitedly, not looking up from her phone as she types away. I agree along with a few others before falling back ways onto the couch, halfway on Chase's lap, and half on Jack's where they're sitting next to each other,

"Yeah, but now I remember why I stopped going to parties: I'm exhausted!" I dramatically whine, a headache forming from the after shocks because of all the yelling and noise form the party. It's about four am and the house is just now almost clear. It's just Thomas, Chase, Jack, Bryce, Alex, Kouvr, Dixie, and Charli up here left in the main living room, but Charli isn't even awake, passed out of Dixie's shoulder.

"Actually, you stopped going to parties because your boy-" Alex starts, clearly about to make a joke about Mason, but Kouvr slaps his arm, his voice cutting off, stopping the sentence halfway into it. Everyone around us widens their eyes, including Alex and their faces move in sync, slowly panning to look from him to me.

I don't react, just staring up at the ceiling. Chase and Jack stay almost impossibly still, as if if they move they'll set me off. I shake my head after a minute, letting out a hard, sharp, sudden laugh. I feel Chase wince behind me as I stand up, walking out of the room silently. I look down at the floor as I wait for the elevator, hugging my body and thinking about where I was a couple of months ago.

I hear Alex let out a yelp, which probably means Kouvr slapped his arm again. He's okay obviously, it's not his fault I let Mason control me. It's not his fault I let my boyfriend do all of what he did to me.

I wouldn't have been here tonight, that's for sure. Not at a party, one that all of those guys that I'm so close to were at, but also not staying the night here, let alone living here.

I step into the elevator, moving to the back even though it's empty and as the doors close, I slide down the wall. I don't even bother to hit a button, hoping someone else is somewhere in the house is awake and will call it. Or worst case, I get some alone time.

I stare at the silver walls, imagining the movie nights or just cuddling that would end in me getting yelled at or me trying to leave, to go to an event for my job, and him not letting me.

I remember his words, how he described me, addressed me, hurt me emotionally with every word. And worse yet, how he could compliment me immediately after and all would be forgiven, how quickly I would melt back into his arms.

The subtle warnings Charli, Chase, everyone tried to give me. They never pushed though, and maybe most people would say they should have as my friends, but I know why. I can be sensitive. I was happy, or I was trying to be.

I sigh, letting my head fall back against the cold metal wall.

I've been essentially ignoring what happened for the last while. The last month actually.

I've moved twice technically since we broke up.

I hear the mechanical noise of the doors opening, but I don't look up so I only see a pair of hairy legs and air forces walking in towards me. The doors close as the person slides down to sit next to me and I see that it's Bryce. "Hey, Soph," He doesn't physically touch me, just sits close and hugs his knees to his chest too, "What's up?" I tilt my head so the the side of it is laying on my knees and I can see him,

"Just sitting on the floor I guess. Hiding from my reality. Inside the elevator in my mansion. Normal things," I smile, speaking sarcastically even thought the light tone of my voice masks it. He sighs, leaning his head back against the metal,

"You know, Soph, you don't have to just... deal with it. Like, you've been this powerhouse of content online for however many years, through anything and everything, and you were in this almost horrific relationship with that dumbass and still did everything better than all of that, did more. You don't have to keep doing that. I know you took a month or whatever, but that doesn't mean you have to just go back, y'know? You can process it, Soph, you can keep processing it. And from what I've heard, I don't know that you ever started." I watch him talk, trying to force myself to actually process the words. The truth in his words.

"Bryce... I, I don't..." He shakes his head as I trail off, not quite sure how to finish the thought, before moving closer and wrapping an arm behind me gently. I tilt my head so that it falls onto his shoulder as he speaks,

"Look, I haven't been your friend as long as Chase, and Josh, and a lot of people out here Soph, but I've gotten to know you. And I don't normally talk or act like this with anyone. So listen to me good okay? You can't survive on the internet like this. Yeah, you aren't breaking down and crying, but I've never heard you speak or act like you just did. You always are overly nice or genuinely laugh. That was different out there. Don't let yourself change okay? Don't let that douchebag change you." I swallow anxiously, before nodding, looking down to signal that I don't have anything else to say but that I understand. "Alright then, now, I get to go home," He grins, returning back to normal as he stands and presses the first floor button, "You going up to your room to go to bed?" He asks, looking back at me as he pull his phone out of a pocket. I think for a second before answering,

"Actually, I think I'm going to go out." He raises his eyebrows but doesn't say anything to say it's a bad idea, just shrugging,

"You wanna use my car? I can call an Uber, I'm just going home," I raise my eyebrows now, surprised but I stand up, smiling and nodding,

"Yeah! That'd be, that'd be great Bryce. I won't go anywhere crazy, because it's like four am, but yeah, thank you!" He hands me the key, grinning as we step off. He head outside as I walk over to grab a random pair of black and white converse that I left down here when we first got here before sending a quick text to Thomas that I'll be back later.

-

I tap the outside of the car, the calm, cool LA night air blowing into the car as I watch the road, driving along. A truck passes by me, the loud engine disrupting the peace of the late California night.

I've been hearing my phone buzzing against the cup holder ever since I left, probably everyone texting me to come home.

But honestly, I don't want to.

Ever since I left, I've actually been thinking through the last five years.

My time on musical.ly.

My time in the beginning, promoting Tiktok.

Being on tour.

The beginning of our relationship, Mason and I's, before everything fell apart.

All the warning signs, the ones I didn't see until recently. The small ones that I didn't even process until today.

The scariest nights, the ones no one ever knew about, not until that night when I freaked out because he came to the house.

The last month. I've been so numb, pretending I'm processing, even to myself, but I don't even know what's been happening.

But things aren't going to be like this anymore.

-

Honestly guys, driving around at night to clear your head is like the best kind of medicine.

Hi! I honestly don't know when the last time I up this was, but here it is.

Let me know what you thought with votes, comments, etc, I hope you guys liked it!

Thank you so much for reading, love you!