Forget me- Not [ Oh Sehun FF ]

데이지- Daisy

🍀🌸🍀

Within the first hour of being back in the building Sehun had been thrown up against a locker, taunted by some 'tough guy' on his way to first period, and found a Welcome Back to Hell note stuck to the floor of his locker. He had also found himself skipping PE and hiding in the bathroom stalls gripping the hook stuck there on the door and crying dryly into his forearms.

No tears. Just heaving and the pounding of his fist against the grey stall door angrily, spinning in the echoes of his own self-loathing.

His mother and with her  signature pantsuit, pulls up to the front door of Seoul High School in the family minivan. She smiles to him from the driver's seat and reaches across his lap to open his door.

"First day back," she says in a voice that is supposed to be reassuring but ends up coming out a bit pushy. She's glancing at her watch, ready to leave him here so that she can get to the University and do her lecture on the Cold War. She's decided to take his father's advice to 'stop babying him'. Although it's been a bit hard for her these past couple of days, she seems to have conveniently mastered it this morning.

Sehun turns his head to her, his eyes pleading and she straightens herself in her seat, moving her head stiffly to turn her eyes back to the front so that she doesn't have to look at him. For the third time this morning he wishes he didn't jump out of that train's path.

"Mom," he mutters quietly, watching as her fingers tighten around the steering wheel.

"No Sehun," she says tensely, biting her lip with her eyes held forcefully on the pavement before them. "You have to go."

He swallows hard, his body heavy against the car seat, and numbly pushes the door the rest of the way open. Hesitantly, he unbuckles his seatbelt, letting it drag across his chest slowly to buy himself as much time as he can.

"Mom," he tries again, this time with his voice wavering. He watches her face pinch, but she doesn't answer him. "Mom," he repeats, "I'm scared."

She shakes her head. Lips pursing, she turns her head away completely,
tucking a hand under her bangs to cover her face.

Her breathes are deeper now and seem to ripple when she whispers, "Go."

His insides flip, his fingers suddenly beginning to shake as he slides the strap of his backpack over his shoulder and steps out of the car.

"I can't do this," he says shakily with his hand on the door, ready to close it when he gets the expected answer. He has to let her know, though. Just in case.

"You're capable of more than you think, Sehun. I promise you that," she tells him surely while wiping her eyes, her voice still choking on the tears she's holding back.

"I wish you could understand," he says under his breath and slams the door.

The first few steps up the walk to the main entrance of the school had never terrified him more in his life. His goal had been to never come back and face the people he ran away from. Things, he thought, as he opened the front door, can only get worse.

Sehun bangs his head numerous times against the stall door, hating himself again for jumping out of the way of the train. He's coughing grossly, tasting bile in the back of his throat and trying to stop himself from crying by biting into his arm, leaving crescent shaped teeth marks indented in his skin.