fifty shades of hudson

chapter 8

Finn pov.

I starre at her while she runs up the stairs in the sheets.

What she yelled at me really came hard at me. I like her that is for sure. But I don't do romance. I never did. But she is so different. She makes me a different person. But I don't want to feel that painfull side of the past.

I feel great when I am in my playroom being the master. Making the woman feel good. And enjoying their punishment when they don't listen to me. My whole body and mind are commited to that.

But I don't want to lose rachel either. I sigh and walk up the stairs.

Rachel pov.

I am done in the shower and dry myself when I feel arms on my shoulder. I turn my head around and see finn standing there.

" What do you want?" I ask him softly.

" I can't change rachel"." And I can't tell you about my past or let you touch me"." I am not ready". He said with sad eyes.

"I know that now"." And I can't be the girl you want me to be". I said and step a side of him.

"Can you bring me some clothes?". I said soft and he looks at me with worry in his eyes but turns around and walks out.

I let out a sigh.

I feel so confused right now. I need to leave here.

I dried my hair when finn returns.

And hands me a dress and underwear and heels.

"I have this for you". He said and handed me.

"I can't take all this finn"." It is all to much". I said soft looking at the dress in my hands.

"Just take it". He said and leaves the bathroom.

I am on the edge of crying. It is like my heart is breaking. But I can't go through with this weird kind of relationship.

I put on the under wear, the dress and heels. The dress is dark red untill under my knees. It is a perfect dress. Finn defently has a good taste.

I shake my head. I can't do this.

I walk out of the bathroom and grab my purse and coat and put it on.

I see finn standing by the window and he turns around when he sees me walking in. His eyes are full of pain and it breaks my heart. But I can't do this.

I walk up to him and kiss his cheek.

"Goodbye finn"? I wisper in his ear and walk to the frontdoor. Every step I take my heart gets a bigger hole. But I need to do this. This was not the life I wanted with a guy. When I am at the door I turn around one more time and I see that finn isn't there anymore. I turn back and walk out. Out of the love of my life.

When I came home I told marley what happend. But I left the contract and the playroom part out of it. She was angry at him. She wanted to punch him. It was really sweet of her and I am glad she is my best friend. She even dragged me to a bar.

So here I am. Dancing with marley on the dance floor and getting drunk. I wanted to forget all what happend. I wanted to not feel the pain I had in my heart.

I was dancing when I felt hands around my waist and for a moment I hoped it was finn. But when I turned around I saw it was jesse, my ex.

" jesseeee.. whaaattt. .are you doiiingg here" I said blurring out because of me being drunk.

"Hey rach, just hanging with my friends"." You are pretty drunk" he said laughing and I blushed. "Yeah". I said and I hang myself against him. "Plettyyyy dllunk" I said giggling while jesse try to hold me.

He said something to marley and than he turned back to me. "Come on"." Lets get you out of here". He said and he dragged me out of the bar.

The fresh air was feeling great on my skin. Than I get a phone call and I picked it up.
R- hellooooo finny
F- rachel are you drunk?
R- ( giggling) mayyybeee
F- where are you?
R- outttsidee. A bar with jesse. Nice guy. (Giggling)
F- I will be there in a minute.
R- okayyyyyyy

I hang up the phone and giggled and lean in to jesse he smirked.

He did my hair a side and looked into my eyes he leaned in and than I felt his lips on mine. That second I felt myself sober up. And try to push jesse off of me but it was no use.

"Come on I know you still like me". He said in my ear.

"No jesse"." I don't want this"." Please stop". I said and try to push him off.

The next moment I fell on the ground and I reallise jesse is pulled away from me.

"She said stop"." You don't treat a girl like that". I hear finn say harsh but demanding.

"Aww.. come on"." She wanted me". Jesse said still in the grip of finns hands.

"I heard her"." She wanted you to stop"." So you better walk away now before I call the police". He said and let jesse go. Jesse looked at me angry. "So you have a new boyfriend?". He said and before I could answer he walked away.

Finn bent down. And picked me up. Before I know I fall a sleep in his arms.