THE WAY WE STAY

Chapter 17

JANE'S P.O.V

The day of punishment number one was dead boring already. I had never felt so useless in my life. I even did a house deep cleaning to make up the day but it resulted me nothing but tired body. But I realized that this was a fair scheme. Mom and Dad called during lunch time for a lecture session of how I should have not reckoned Joe, ever again, whatever the reason could be. I understood wholly, though they did not understand why it mattered so much to me -- to help Riley.

Ding dong, the bell rang.

Time showed only half past one in the afternoon. I did not think Mark would be home this early.

I approached the front door and peeked through the window.

Natasha?

I opened the door with fluttered heart. "What do you want?"

"You're Jane, right? Can we talk?" She sounded straightforward and impudent, however in a much harmless way.

"You don't step into my house." I closed the door and walked to the porch. "How do you know me? How do you know my house?"

She let out a deep sigh, eyes locked to something insignificant on the ground. The moment lasted a minute, which confused me double times. Obviously she did not search for my address and risked herself coming here only to take a break from a hussle life.

"So, you were a mother, too."

Her first words already scared the hell out of me.

"Wow." I chuckled offendedly. "If you got nothing else to say, please leave now."

"Who was Joe to you?" She insisted.

I looked away, shook my head in disbelief, and was ready to proceed to go inside the house, but her calmer tone stopped me.

"You don't want to talk? Fair enough. Let me do the talking instead."

She stole a glance at me but I replied with a stiff reaction, unbothered.

"Joe was always there for me in Riley's absence." She started to speak. "I know it sounds bad. I might say pregnancy hormone got me super clingy onto someone's presence, but no, it was just me. Joe looks like a better, more stable option."

I sat back porch bench, did not bother to face her directly, however listened.

"I admit, what I had with Joe was real. I was clearly running from Riley. But I didn't know he was running from you too." She walked closer. "I just spent my morning looking for everything. Now it all makes sense."

"It never did." I rolled my eyes. "Funny how life leads us here. Never in my life had I imagined talking to the woman my ex cheated with -- or should I say, still cheating?"

"Huh, broke up like half an hour ago, and this time for real." She secretly wiped her tear but I saw it. "Do you know why I left the twins with Riley all these years?"

I remained silent.

"Because I know I can trust him. The fact that our relationship didn't work, that's one thing. But I left the twins with him because I know he'll take care of them. I never entirely not care of the girls. All these years, here and there, I still peeked on Riley's social pages to check on them. I saw that you guys had fun at the beach the other day." She nodded softly. "I left the babies with him because I knew I wouldn't be able to handle them any better."

I started to sob. The accused bad mother was never entirely bad after all.

"But when I found out who Joe really is, how he treated you and your daughter..." Natasha stuttered. "I was planning to take the girls with me in a dream of having a real family with Joe. Turns out your past told me he might never liked the idea. He was never a good father for Amelia, so-"

"Stop."

I broke my both ankles falling down the floor crying river. My dear Amelia was like a posession of gold that I would not want to share with anybody. I normally only allowed my parents and Mark to mention her name. So Natasha just pressed a wrong button -- and I was supposedly angry. But she mentioned her name almost too gracefully; shocking however forgiven.

"So uhm, Jane," Natasha tried to pick herself back from sobbing hard. "What do you think I should do?"

"I'm never in a position to tell you what to do." I stared boldly into her eyes. "But if you've still ever, by a slightest chance, thought about making it up again with Joe, please leave the twins for Riley."

She was the one trapped in silence and heavy breath this time.

"You know deep down there, they're better off with him."

The wind blew our hair. The porch remained cold as our conversation left untouched. Natasha slowly took her handbag and walked to her car. I grinded my teeth to look at her in the eyes. She slowly nodded, then proceeded to drive away.

The moment she left was the moment I gave up to my own fight. The emotions that I felt were too bold and overpowering, my body started trembling. I curled myself in Mark's favorite swing, tears never stopped falling while looking at Amelia's pictures on my encrypted folder.

"W-what the heck?!"

I heard Mark's voice from the garage and his rushed footsteps toward me. I slowly opened my eyes. It was dark. Did I fall asleep for that long?

"Are you crazy? Do I have to remind you how bad the wind is for your health?"

Mark carried me into the living room. He whined unstoppably while provided me hot tea to calm my shivering body.

"Look at you." He raised his tone. "I was only out for class, God's sake."

"Natasha's here." I replied when I got ahold of myself back.

"What?"

Mark was taken aback by surprise, and another voice echoed the same shocked reaction from the front door.

"R-Riley?" I turned around and stupefied.

"Hey..."

He approached to sit next to me, while Mark decided to be a passive listener at the corner of the sofa.

"You could tell us what happened." Riley added and softly stroked my back.

"She came out of the blue and told me what she just found out about Amelia." I spoke hesitantly.

"He knew."

Mark glanced at Riley as the man firmly nodded. Therefore, I resumed the story.

"She mentioned about not entirely leaving the kids. She told me she's still watching them over your update." I stared at Riley.

"Huh, don't buy it-"

"But I do." I reassured. "Natasha mentioned something about looking at Joe's past, and that's how she knows where to find me. She insisted to talk to me out of the same concern."

"I can't have another conversation where I'm told to forgive her, no." Riley dissed.

"And she asked me what to do." I kept talking though Riley has stopped listening. "She asked me what she should do about the twins."

Suddenly I got his whole attention. Thosw pair of red eyes met mine with so much worry. Mark also held his breath, it was too obvious.

"I told her to let the twins stay with you if she really cares."

The gentlemen let out a deep relieved sigh. Mark quickly excused himself to go to his room because he knew Riley could use some private moment with me.

"I..." Riley roamed around the room restlessly. "Did she say yes?"

I shook my head. "I can't tell clearly. But she left the house with peace."

Riley was all in his zone, probably calculated possibilities in his head. He was also seen busy texting. Had my last words unattended, I laid down on the couch to rest my dizzy head. Today was mentally a lot more tiring than a whole-day class would be.