3 (jaylor) perpetual darkness and stolen sequin smiles

chapter thirteen.

It felt like she hadn't seen her daughter in months, felt as if she hadn't seen her smile, or heard from her in ages. That's because it had actually been months since she'd seen Taylor in person. This seemed odd, considering that most of the time, Taylor would try to see her at least once a week. Now, Andrea was lucky if she heard her daughter's voice through the phone once every two weeks.
Andrea had always been the sort of person to over analyse everything, especially when it came to her children. She had always been the sort of person to worry about them, to stress whenever she missed their calls or hadn't heard from them in a while. Of course, she always tried to convince herself that they were fine, that they were adults now, but she still couldn't help but worry. Particularly about Taylor. Andrea knew that Austin was alright, knew that he didn't have as much to worry about as Taylor. She'd often go to bed at night and worry about them, worry about the fact that Taylor might have read something online that had made her doubt herself. Andrea knew that Taylor had problems regarding what the media said about her in the past, and all the drama that had happened recently with that idiot Kanye West. Andrea knew that, like herself, Taylor would be pretending as if she wasn't impacted by it, would act as if it didn't hurt her.
So, she'd told Taylor that she was coming to visit her. Taylor, to Andrea's surprise, hadn't said no. In fact, she'd said yes. She'd almost sounded like herself, but Andrea couldn't ignore the slight change in her voice. The slight tremor that hadn't been there the last time she'd seen her. Taylor had offered to pick her up from the airport, and Andrea was excited to see her alone. She hadn't met Adam yet, only seen him in photos that Taylor had sent from their holiday together, or when Taylor had been FaceTiming her and Adam had been in the background. Now, the FaceTimes had stopped, and Andrea had already added that to the big list of things that she was worried about. She had yet to decide whether she was actually going to approach Taylor with these questions, and she'd concluded that she would decide that when she saw her. If Taylor looked visibly different, or Andrea could tell that something was wrong with her, then she'd ask. But... if Taylor looked happy, if she looked like the person she'd seen all those months ago, then she wouldn't.

Taylor was waiting in the car park for her, and when Andrea saw her, she felt relief flood through her body. At least she was okay, she was here, in one piece.
"Hey, Mom!" Taylor smiled as she got out of the car to help her with her suitcase. Taylor looked... skinnier than she had when Andrea had last seen her. "How was the flight?"
"Smooth, thank goodness." Andrea pulled her daughter in for a hug. Taylor was so much more petite than last time, and she couldn't help but worry. "How are you?"
"Good," Taylor smiled. Andrea studied her face, studied her voice, but she couldn't hear anything wrong. Taylor looked... happy. Her smile was the same, her laugh was the same. All of her was the same. Except for her eyes. Her eyes had changed, Andrea noticed as she smiled at her daughter. Her eyes weren't sparkling like they once had.

Andrea remembered her eyes, the way they'd been the last time she was here. The way they'd sparkled when she'd talked about her music, or how lovely it was to get away with Adam for a while. Her eyes weren't glistening in the sunlight as they had once before. Taylor's eyes used to spell out happiness, even when she was a little girl. Andrea knew when Taylor was happy because her eyes used to be bubbly, bright and alive. Her eyes had always been alive, so radiant and luminous. But now, that glow was nonexistent. That everlasting, glittering light had stopped. Andrea wondered how long it had been gone for. Her smile was the same, but it didn't meet with her eyes. Taylor always smiled with her eyes, but now... her eyes were quiet. They were distant and hazy in a way that scared Andrea. Taylor's eyes had never looked like that before, never had appeared so lifeless and... sad.