I miss you on late nights. I feel you in sadness and it usually comes in waves and tonight I'm drowning. I'm gasping for air. I'm ex ousted. I want to start over again. Back to the day that I decided to talk to you at that dark blue table. You intimidate me and I'm not sure why. I miss you. It's hard to put in words. You use to be my life line. All that made me happy. You were my hero, my first love honestly. And then you did it, you changed in the blink of an eye. I tried to be strong like you taught me but I am now realizing that's why I was trying so hard in the first place. It was for you I was not my main concern, you were. I did whatever you wanted because I was on this high. This high that I only felt with you. For the first time I felt loved and appreciated for what I was. I'm slipping into old habits because you arn't here to help me. I'm fighting this battle alone. I got so use to you swooping in like some kind of super hero to help me. But now you are gone so my wrist hurt my eyes burn and my heart was left broken. I feel you in nights like this. Nights when I'm crying and write dumb poems. Putting how i feel about you into words is very complicate. I hate the person you have become but god I miss the person you use to be, what we use to be. Just thinking about our memories makes my in tire body tremble. I want to feel loved again. No one can make me feel the way you made me feel. I try to fill this void inside of me that has been open since you left. And the worst part is you just left. You were gone without a trace. I feel like if could have gotten over you a lot easier if you would have told me goodbye. It's not the first time I have been left alone but it sure feels like it. Eight whole months and I wish I could go back in time and change what I did. I still apologize to you everyday for a reason I will never know. You say I have changed, but you fail to realize it is not only me that has changed it's you too. You are different, completely different. A year ago I got an I love you everyday, and now I'm lucky if I get a smile from you. I miss you on late nights just like like tonight.
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Hey I'm sorry I haven't been posting as much (If you care thank you so much ^.^) I have been feeling kind of weird latly /: and my internet is very bad. But yeah have a good day/night and stay happy.
