The Monster Inside Me ||Stiles Stilinski||

II.

"So yeah 6:30 as Derek said. Bring what you need laptop and stuff you know" said Scott feeling quite awkward. They haven't spoken to Stiles for like what three weeks, maybe a month. It was weird standing in front of him, and the smell of cigarette...ugh horrible. Lydia must have read his mind when she spoke up " Since when did you start smoking? " it came out sassier than she wanted it to. Stiles was taken aback by this question.. "Uhm jeez maybe three weeks ago ? Give or take a few days." Shrugged it of like it's nothing. Because in reality for him it was nothing, only a distraction. "Well you should stop, it isn't good for you" her tone sounded quite bossy in a way Stiles couldn't wrap himself around "And since when did any of us started to care about what's good for me?" Lydia was taken aback.. no she was stunned, couldn't believe her own ears. Her facial expression resembled a fish gaping for air. "See y'all in the meeting" with that Stiles quickly went back to school. He has a free period now but needed to get away from them. His legs took him to the library where he sat down in a quite corner to do his homework.
While the pack stayed in their places stunned. What's just happened... Was written all over their faces. That sentence burnt, burnt like a wrong medicine. Why would Stiles say something like that to them.. "Is it just me or did this conversation felt really weird?" asked Isaac. Why would he say that.. This was the question of the day... They didn't get it which made things even worse...
As evening rolled around Stiles felt his anxiety getting worse and worse by the moment. He was torn between going to the pack meeting and just not showing up, finding some shitty excuse about his whereabouts...Fuck it... He ruffled through his slightly grown out hair and hopped into his jeep. He could hear his heart beating in his ears. It's been a while since they asked for his help or presence. He didn't know how to act or what to say. Everything was just confusing at the moment.
Meanwhile in Derek's loft the pack gathered around the papers they had, which to be honest wasn't much. At first they tried to find information themselves but it just wasn't enough nor useful. They had to accept the fact that they needed Stiles's help. The pack thought leaving Stiles on his own for a while would help him process. Oh boy were they in the wrong.
As they hunched over paper upon papers, somebody knocked on the door. "This must be Stiles" Derek got up from his seat and opened the large metal door of the loft. There he stood not making any form of eye contact. "H..Hi" he said quietly "Come, let's get this over with" Derek sat back on his seat and Stiles carefully followed. He walked there where the other's were "So...what do you need me to do exactly?" he was hesitant with his words. This all felt so strange and wrong in many ways. " As you see we have a few information gathered but it isn't enough" Derek pointed on the stack of papers in the far corner of the table. Stiles took this as his que to take them and flip through them. These weren't so bad but missed key points to it. "Yeah I can work with these" he said it in a low tone more to himself as a reassurance that he can do this. "This means you'll help us, right ?" Scott beamed in like it wasn't obvious already. Stiles didn't answer him just sat down and got started. He felt a weird sensation in his chest. A mixture of happiness and sourness. Happy because he finally does something that he likes to do, on the other hand sad because he felt as if he was only useful for this. Researching. His only purpose and the only reason why they needed him. He shook his head a little to  hush these voices and got started with the work.
Hours went by which for Stiles felt like minutes. Only minutes because he was distracting himself with something. On the other hand some members of the pack got impatient "How long more till you finish?" Derek's voice was loaded with impatience. Stiles felt in and made him kind of nervous. Although he tried to keep his heart steady because he knew that they can pick up on any sudden change. "Maybe thirty minutes max. I have to check a couple more things" he didn't even look up from his computer. Staying focused was his best option. " I'm starving. What if we order something to eat until he finishes?" ugh perfect ideas Scott just what I needed... Stiles thought. As Stiles got lost in his own train of thoughts he completely missed the fact that they left him out when they went through with whom wanted to eat what. Good. He thought. He wasn't hungry, not at all. Haven't eaten in four days or so, although he got used to it. Sadness and overthinking can take away your appetite. Which didn't bother him because in his mind he didn't deserve to eat.
Those thirty minutes flew by like a blink for him. Pack got their food and were eating happily around him. He made a few last touches and started printing out everything. Finally Derek got a printer after nagging him for months... He got up from his seat and categorised the documents. As he went back to the others he saw how happy they were without him, didn't blame them though... He put the carefully selected documents in the middle of the table so each of them could take a good look on it " Done. There's everything you need to know or be careful about" Derek was the first to take a look and nodded with approval. Realived, he started packing his laptop away. " Why don't you stay ? We got...oh" Scott cut his own sentence in half as he realized they forgot to order food for Stiles... "Don't worry Scott I wasn't hungry anyway" he showed a small smile in his way which didn't reach his eyes, and was out already on his way home.
"How could you forget to ask him if he wants anything?" Lydia was outraged to say the least.. "He did all the work for us and you couldn't even ask him?" if looks could kill Scott would be a dead man by now. Lydia caught on with Stiles's behavior in the past month and she was worried. Very worried for her friend. "You are all so oblivious it actually pains me" now this statement was addressed to the whole pack " What do mean by this Lydia?" confusion was written all over Scott's puppy face. "You guys don't see how his behavior changed and not in a good way. But it's a waist of breath to try and explain it to you.." with that she gathered her stuff and left. Once again leaving the rest stunned.