Tasty Oneshots

𝑆𝑡𝑜𝑟𝑦 2

This morning, I woke up to a painter painting my face because he doesn't like raccoons.

I went down stairs, not even bothering to wash my face, to get some coffee. I drank to much of the coffee and it made my anxiety go through the roof.

It triggered my digestive system to release everything. I didn't even have time to make it to the toilet.

I didn't want to get the chairs in my kitchen dirty, so I ate my breakfast inside the oven.

When I was done, I crawled back up the stairs and went into the shower.

While I was washing myself, I recited quotes about the love for pasta. 

When I finished showering, I got dressed as if if were cold outside, even though it was May.

I got my laptop and climbed into my bathtub and started my zoom class.

I started falling asleep and my classmate noticed a booger hanging out of my nose and told everyone else and the whole class, even the teacher were laughing at me.

I left the zoom class and closed my laptop and went down stairs to eat some lunch.

There was no food in the fridge except chicken and a bunch of other meats and dairy products, so I decided to eat my coat.

After my yummy lunch, I painted my chewed up nails, the blue shade of a bruise.

While I waited for my nails to dry, I did my daily meditation by skipping on my neighbours front lawn.

When my neighbour came out and yelled at me like he usually does, it made me wet.

I quickly ran inside, grabbing my sandpaper, laying down on my bed, then I masturbated.

A few hours later, I finished masturbating with my sandpaper. I went to my closet and put on my cigarette patterned pajamas.

I wasn't hungry, so I went to sleep, dreaming about rainbows.