I'm A Walking Disaster (jalex)

First step towards repair

Chapter Twenty One

Title from Canals by All Time Low

I wasn't finished, but it was half a chapter or no chapter.

We walked in the Day room to see the tables set up, one table had Kool Aid, Two of the tables had bread and butter set out. Dr.Grace smiled at us "hi, boys! Please take a seat at table two" she said warmly, pointing at one of the tables with bread and butter.
I wasn't sure what we would be doing with any of this, but I recognized how uncomfortable it made Jack.
As more people came in she didn't assign them to tables, but she placed Andrew and Hunter at the other bread and butter table. The group was smaller than usual, I guessed they had some in the other room.
Vic and Jonny sat with Jack and I, Jack was visibly upset by the food, and he seemed uncomfortable about Vic and Jonny sitting with us.

"Hey, hey it's okay" I whispered to Jack when Jonny and Vic started talking to each other.
Jack looked at me and nodded lightly, focusing on his hands.

"Okay, so today our recreational therapy will be focusing on everyday activities. We have one table making Kool Aid, and the other two tables will be cutting and buttering bread, I left detailed instructions out, but if you need further guidance I'll be glad to help. Once everything is made each person will get a cup of Kool Aid and a piece of bread, you are expected to eat it" Dr.Grace paused, glancing at Jack before continuing, "any questions?" She asked kindly, seeing no one raise their hand she smiled "okay, you may begin"

Vic was the first to move, he passed everyone a napkin, his hands were shaky as he did so. Jonny picked up his slice of bread and carefully moved it onto his napkin, Vic opened the butter.
Jack and I basically watched them.

"Y-Can you hand me one?" Jack whispered nervously, I nodded gently and placed a slice of bread on his napkin and mine. Vic was watching Jonny cut his bread with an actual butter knife, it wasn't plastic.
There were only two knives at the table, Vic looked like he was going to share with Jonny, so I grabbed the other knife and cut my slice of bread in half.

Dr.Grace was standing behind us as Jack took the knife from me and slowly cut into his bread, I could hear his breathing and his grip on the knife looked painful. His other hand shook as he held the bread in place.
"Good job, Jack" Dr.Grace said softly, trying to contain her excitement.

Once she walked away to check on the other groups, Jack finished and nearly dropped the knife.
I looked over to Vic who was spreading the butter carefully onto the bread, Jonny smiled over to me.
"Does she really think we need to practice spreading butter on slices of bread?" He laughed, Vic nodded in agreement as he passed the knife to Jonny.
"it's not like it's challenging to cut bread, to put butter on it, and to eat it" he said again, Vic looked almost distressed as Jonny spoke, almost right after Jonny said that Jack dropped the knife. A loud clang erupted, quieting the barely audible buzz of the room.

I looked over to Jack as he bent over to pick the knife off the ground "sorry" he mumbled, placing it back on the table.
The room went back to their small conversations but Jonny and Vic continued to look closely at Jack.
I felt terrible at how upset this activity made Jack, but I was proud that he was trying.
We made eye contact, I nodded reassuringly at him and he seemed to relax just a bit.

Jonny handed me the knife him and Vic were using, I quickly got the butter on my knife and spread it on each of the halves. Once I was finished I handed it to Jack, he was hesitant about the butter but got a very small portion on his knife and slowly spread it on one of the halves. I looked up to meet eyes with a smiling Dr.Grace across the room, she nodded and me and I smiled back at her.
Jack went back for the other small portion of butter, spreading it on the other half.

Once we were all done at our table, we put the knives in the center of the table, and Jonny handed everyone another napkin. Everyone only got one half of bread, so we put each half on a different napkin and we had a few minutes before every group finished.

"Good job, guys" Dr.Grace spoke once every group was finished. Another nurse helped her to hand everyone a paper cup of the red Kool Aid, Dr.Grace took four of our eight pieces of bread and passed them to each person, doing the same with the other groups.
"Okay, now I want each of you to eat and at your table I want you to share one good thing about your day"
As she said that Jonny rolled his eyes, once she stopped talking everyone started.

Eating a piece of bread and drinking Kool aid wasn't hard for me, I easily did both of those.
Jack was trembling, I didn't stare at him as he picked up his bread but I could see him out of the corner of my eye. I decided to distract everyone so they wouldn't notice how long it took him to eat, or how much he was shaking.

"Are we going to share something good about our day?" I asked, Vic shrugged but Jonny chuckled.

"We never do what she says for the activity" he commented truthfully, I looked over to her and back at Jonny.

"But I wouldn't want her to over hear us talking about something else" I replied, noticing my distraction was working. I could see that Jack had eaten a bite out of his bread out of the corner of my eye. Jonny sighed and looked at Vic, telling him to start without physically saying it.

"Uh, the best part of my day is probably drinking something that isn't milk or water" he replied, earning a chuckle from Jonny, I smiled and watched Jack from the corner of to my eye, three bites out of his bread. I realized that this was my first time seeing Jack eat, and god, he was even beautiful in his trembling form.

"Same!" Jonny laughed, looking at his empty cup. "Mrs.Jett said it's supposed to rain, I have the window so it should be interesting" he commented seconds later. I nodded in approval as I enjoy rain.

"Well the best part of my day was getting to touch actual silverware and I haven't in weeks" I said, running my finger on the cold, dull blade of the butter knife.
Vic and Jonny both nodded and smiled at my comment.

I looked over to Jack, he had taken at least five bites out of the bread, and over half of it was gone. I noticed his hand shaking more than before, he took a deep breath and swallowed hard. I looked back at Jonny and Vic as they talked to each other about something else. And out of the corner of my eye I watched Jack scoot up, and shove the remainder of his bread in his jacket pocket. I felt slightly disappointed but I reminded myself that he is eating.
Normally he hardly finishes half, he's never eaten the food in recreational therapy.
He is Improving.

I watched as he took sips from the Kool aid, it seemed to be easier for him to drink than to eat stuff, but he still seemed to be struggling. Eventually he finished it.

I looked over to Dr.Grace, and almost instantly she met eyes with me. I smiled at her and she smiled at me in return, but her eyes quickly shot to Jack and I noticed her face light up.
I looked at him and saw that he was already looking at me, his face was paler than usual, he looked like he was going to throw up.

"Are you okay?" I whispered, Jack nodded quickly and gave me a small smile.

"I'm okay"