Cursed Love

16

  I cracked open my eyes. I sat up and looked around the bedroom. The place was deserted. I had a splitting headache and I had a slight double vision. I breathed in and out when it came back. James. Riley. The assassination. My head snapped to where James lay. "James, oh god, James." I crawled over to where his body lay and stroke his hair gently, wishing that he was still with me. Tears flowed down my cheeks like rivulets and the despair was there again. Why did this happen? I only kissed him yesterday...I should have another year at least. 

  Just then, I noticed he was still breathing. Shallow and shaky, perhaps, but breathing nonetheless. "James?" I turned him so he lay on his back and faced me. Oh god, the blood. It was a horrendous and horrifying sight. But he was alive! "James!" I exclaimed as his eyes cracked open just a little bit. He struggled a bit, but managed a weak and wan smile. I sobbed in happiness. "Oh god, I thought I lost you." I whispered as I stroked his cheek.

  Upon hearing that, his expression changed to one of utmost sadness. "James, what's wrong?" I studied the cut on his neck. Shallow enough for him to survive for a little while, but deep enough to be fatal. "No...James..." Pearly tears fell from my eyes. How could I live in peace, with yet another boy's death hanging above me? WIth more red on my ledger? With yet another scar on my heart? 

  "You can't leave me like this...please..." He gripped my hand and squeezed it, as though in reassurance. I grabbed on to it, like how a child would hold on to the hand of the mother in a huge crowd, lest she be lost. James smiled sadly and shook his head. He knew he was not going to make it. He coughed up some blood and rasped, hacking, stammering, "Lo-Lorna...I-I-I...Lorna, I..." He gasped in pain and heaved a breath. And another. And...he was gone.

   No. No. He can't die. Not like this. Not in the hands of my best friend. "What? You what?" You're sorry? You love me? You what? I sobbed harder than before, knowing that I would never know what he wished to tell me in his last moments, knowing that I will never hear his voice again, see his smile again, feel him again...Knowing that he will no longer be part of my life. It hurt. It hurt so bad and I knew, if given a chance, I would do anything to get him back.

  "Careful what you wish for, beautiful." That voice. Soft and gentle and sweet. It rang through the room, clear as crystal and crisp as bells. Yet, it was distant. Like a dream. Like a thought that was just there, on the tips of your fingers, but you can not quite reach it. I knew that voice. I knew it so well. The hauntings of my nightmares. The dark thoughts buried at the back of my mind. The flashbacks I try so hard to suppress.

   David.

  I looked up, tear streaked. There he was, as perfect as the day I met him, with his soft smile and compassionate eyes. "David." I whispered. Without thinking it through, I launched myself at him and threw myself into his arms. Surprisingly, they were perfectly solid and they wrapped around me, enveloping me in warmth. His fingers stroked my hair gently, calming me down like how he always did.

  I guess spirits are solid. They are the souls of people, the strongest part of their body. The part that make them them. Not the mind, but the soul. Of course it would be solid and perfectly real. Was there ever any doubt about it?

  "Hush, love, hush. I am here now." He soothed and I relaxed visibly. Over the years, I guess I forgot how much I missed his sweet voice, and how much I needed it so very badly. 

  "James." I whispered into his clothes. That one single word, and he understood. That was David. My David. "How are you even---? Why---?" I pulled away and looked at him, puzzled and slightly more cautious.

  "How I'm here?" He asked, laughing. He shrugged his shoulders gracefully. "I don't know. All I know is that He allowed me to be here so I am here. To help you. No, perhaps help is not quite a good word. Mmm...How about give you? Yes, that sounds right. I am here to give you your choices." He rambles and I frowned. But still, I inclined my head, motioning him to continue.