Hopeless

Crash

"You're going to lose everything, everyone in your life if you keep up life this. You don't deserve him. He needs someone better than you. You're just going to break him."

"Wake up, please Jessica wake up!" My body is shaking. I can feel cold  under my legs and face. I feel my heart beat, and it's slowed down.

"J-Jesse?" I open my eyes and the light blinds me. "What happened?" I try to stand but collapse. I realize that I'm over my toilet. "D-did you carry me up here?"

"I don't know what happened. Jeez Jess I leave you alone for a half hour and this shit happens. Yeah I brought you up here. You started coughing up bile." Jesse helps me stand.

"I dunno what to say for myself. " I fill up my cup with water and chug it. "Jesse I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

"Hey no no, don't be, look you messed up, it's okay. Here." He passes me a cigarette and a lighter. "I uh, cleaned up your face for you."

"Thanks" I smile, " Let's go sit outside. I could use some air."

Jesse puts his hand around my waist and helps me walk outside. I lay down on the grass, and light my smoke. The sunlight feels refreshing.

Jesse lays down beside me. "I think we should stop."

I turn to look at him "Stop what?"

"Using," he lowers his voice," look what just happened. I don't want to lose you Jessica. What you said, last night, I think I feel it too. And I can't lose you."

"Jesse, what happened wasn't attributed to using. Maybe the fact that I had my face smashed, was probably stuck in a trunk with no air for however long, then tied up, in the middle of the desert, with no food or water, and then I saw someone's life taken, right before my eyes. So if you're suggesting it was an overdose I think you're wrong."

I take a puff of my cigarette, and Jesse snatches it out of my mouth.

"How much did you do?"

"I dunno, maybe like eleven lines and four bowl. I don't count." I glare at Jesse.

"Holy fuck Jessica, you're lucky nothing worse happened. This was obviously an O.D plain and simple. You need to stop. Don't you care about yourself?"

" I don't know. You're the only person I've cared about in a while. When Adam was threatening me, all I wanted was for him to not hurt you. I didn't care about myself. And aside from you, meth is the only thing making me happy. "

"Jessica, I'll be sober with you. We can do this. I know we can. Please."

"I don't know Jesse can we just not do this right now. Look, there's a little kid in my yard."

The child looked young, maybe about four or five. He has blonde hair, brown eyes and rosy cheeks. He's wearing a blue and white striped shirt with what looks like blood stains? He walks over to Jesse and I.

"Hey kid," Jesse says. "Where's your parents?"

"Mommy got hurt, by a man, he wanted a bag of something but she wouldn't give it to him, he put something in her and red stuff came out. I ran away."

I widen my eyes. Jesse stands up and picks the kid up and runs inside my house.. I'm running to Hank's house.

Knock knock knock.

He opens the door. I walk in.

"Hank I need you, there's a kid in my house with Jesse. His mom's been stabbed, I'm pretty sure it's drug related. We need to find this woman."