Hated to Loved

Chapter 15 : Russian Roulette

Thayne's POV

Ember didn't trust me. I didn't blame her.

I walked to camp and sat down by a fire I had managed to build for warmth. I felt something in my pocket and pulled it out to see what it was. Oh...the small handgun my Master had given me for protection.

Why had I stabbed Chase? Surely it wasn't beyond understanding why he wanted to get away permanently. It was probably my fault. I looked over and saw Chase and Ember. Chase looked like he was sleeping and Ember was still struggling to bandage him.

What if you hurt her? A small voice suggested. What? No! I'd never do that! She was too kind, too...perfect, to deserve any pain! But...I'd before thought I would never hurt a single person. I'd at one point, not too long ago, thought I would protect anyone being hurt.

That had proven to be a lie.

A cold fear gripped me and I turned the gun over in my hands. Just do it, if you do then you know that you'll never hurt her~ the voice taunted.

Taking one last look at Ember, possibly forever I took in the way her hair, even knotted and dirty looked beautiful, how much she looks like a queen in the dress, though dirty and bloody from Chase now, ...how much she deserved the world as she took care of the boy who had kicked her in the face and falsely accused her of stealing.

Everything about her was stunning.

And none of it would ever be mine.

I walked away, going down a tunnel for a few minutes and stumbled across a dead end bit of the cave that looked like woods, the stone connecting from the stony ceiling from the rocky ground, mushrooms scattered.

What a perfect, gloomy, place to go out.

I took all bullets out the gun but one.

I put the gun up to my head and pulled the trigger. Nothing. I did it again. Nothing. As I got ready to put it up to my head a third time, I heard a soft voice. "Th-Thayne..? What are you.." the voice trailed off and I turned to look at her. Ember had caught me and she looked concerned, sad...over me.

"i-i'm sorry...I...I don't want to.."

"to what?"

"I-...I'm scared I'll hurt you...and I don't want to, it hurts to see you not trust me and I understand why you wouldn't, I'm not myself, I've done nothing but hurt him, why would I want to help him? I'm the reason he wants to die most likely, and...honestly if you don't trust me I have no one else and life just.." I said, trailing off not wanting to say out loud that I wanted to die, but I'm sure she understood.

She shook her head lightly. "N-No...even if you do hurt me, I won't leave you...and you've done more then hurt him, after all you are the one that carried him when he didn't want to walk, and tried to give him the knife to protect himself...that wasn't me. And, really none of us are ourselves, I know I'm not myself either.." she took a few steps closer. "And, I'm sorry that I didn't trust you with him, It wasn't my intention to hurt you, I know you'd care for him plenty well...please forgive me?"

The distance between us was perhaps two steps away when she stopped. During her speech She'd stirred up feelings I'd never felt before, and though I was angry at myself I felt myself soften and took the two steps toward her and bent down, closing the distance between us with a kiss.

She was surprised and froze for a minute, did I do something wrong?

But before I could pull away and apologize she kissed me back, holding me tightly and deepening it. When we pulled away we locked eyes. Her face was red and mine probably was too, but I had fully enjoyed the kiss.

A scream pieced through the air and Ember sighed. "I was hoping he'd be unconscious awhile longer.."

"I'll help with him, I mean...if you trust me enough."

"Sure, I just dunno if he'll let you." she remarked with a small smile. "I'll simply not give him a say in the matter." I joked. I wouldn't force him to be okay with me, I'd have to prove I won't hurt him again first. If he said no then it would be fine.

We walked towards camp and sure enough, Chase was awake.

When he saw me he tried to stand and I heard him silently curse himself when he couldn't.

"please lay back down Chase, you have to try to relax." Ember pleaded.

"Yeah, I'm not here to hurt you."

He looked at me suspiciously. I stayed a little bit away, knowing if I came closer he'd be unable to relax.

"so why did you scream?"

"why do you think? I tried to move and it hurt." Chase said with a small eye role.

I heard Martha call for help. Come to think of it I hadn't seen her in a few hours...

Ember looked at me as though begging I go check on her. I sighed but nodded, following her cries for help. I did not expect to find what I found. Martha was in a pit. And looked a few years older. What the heck had happened to her?