oceans [h.s.] [on hold]

N i n e

It's been exactly a month since I've spoken to you. One whole freaking month. I want to come back so bad Harry but I'm too afraid to get hurt again. Everyday I see you in those sad halls, journal in hand this sad look in your eyes.

To be completely honest you look horrible, you look like you haven't slept in weeks, your hair is greasy, your back is hunched. But most of all your eyes, they look so sad and dull. They look almost dead, really.

I want you to be happy Harry. I want you to smile again, because I can't go on seeing you hurt like this. I can't go on with this guilty feeling in my stomach anymore because I know I'm the cause of this.

After what happened I was so hurt and felt so pathetic, so I blocked you out. I refused to think about you and beat myself up about it. I thought you didn't care, that you didn't love me. But now I see, I see the way you look at me. You truly do love me. But then again if you loved me why didn't you tell me? Why don't you just come over here and kiss me, hold me, and tell me that you won't ever leave me again?

I see you write in your journal everyday now, and it seems you can't stop writing in it. I wonder what's in it? I wonder if you write about me. I wonder if you know I have a journal, that I write about you.

I want you so bad Harry, and I don't think I can go another waking day not talking. It's impossible to live like this, living like one another never existed. Living like what happened between us, something so great, never happened. I miss you so much. Please come back to me Harry.

~Adeline Walker (2/28/15)

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(authors note)

hey guys! so I suck at updating I know ): , BUT IM GONNA START UPDATING MORE SO YAY!!!

I feel like every time I update now it's not edited and really crappy and I'm sorry but I think now it'll get a little better. sorry.

anyways ily bye!

chantell xx