Im such an idiot I thought to myself, as I pried my lips off his cheek and sat back into my chair, I could tell by his reaction that this was defiantly not what he was expecting or hoping for.
I wasn’t the type of girl who rushed into things with guys, even kissing, I know it seemed lame, but I wanted our first kiss to be special , if we ever had one that is. And tonight didn’t feel special I still felt the awkwardness of last time and I felt like we were suppose to kiss and it was mandatory, so I no longer wanted to.
Harry stood up and I went over to Niall and whispered in his ear, at that very moment Niall stood up grabbing Niveas hand and guided her down stairs and outside, they both gave a quick wave and ran off towards our limo.
“Where are they going?” I slurred chugging my last poured drink nearly spilling it all over my outfit.
“Nialls taking Nivea home.” He said grabbing a napkin and whipping the spilled drink off my arm, his very touch caused me to blush.
“Ready for your present now?” he asked grabbing my hand and gesturing me to follow him, I nodded and proceeded to follow.
We went out to the back of the club where there was no sign of paparazzi, thank god. We climbed into a cab and Harry directed him towards the Four seasons.
Dammit.
My phone buzzed as I was nearly sick at the thought of me and Harry alone in a hotel.
“Don’t Hurry Back!” It was from Nivea
I quickly closed my phone, almost in embarrassment, I cant do this, I needed to get out. But just then the cab pulled over and we were in front of the grand lite up beautiful “Four Seasons” Just like in the movies.
We gracefully, (Stumbling) made our way to the front desk.
“Reservation for John” Harry spoke softly to the elderly man in a black suit behind the desk.
“Right sir, here is your key, your suit is on the 20th floor, enjoy your stay.” He said whilst handing me a bottle of the hotels house wine.
Every ding the elevator made, made my stomach flip more and more. I wasn’t really sure on what to expect, I mean I wouldn’t even kiss him, would he think I would sleep with him?
We gracefully and slowly, and I mean slowly made our way to our room. He slid the key and led me threw the beautiful golden double doors.
“Beautiful isn’t it?” Harry said laying back on the bed. I could tell he had a lot to drink as well, I could hardly understand him.
“Yeah…” I softly said standing awkwardly a yard away from the bed and Him.
“You can come on the bed too , you don’t have to stand at the door all night.” He laughed taking off his shoes and throwing them to the side. “All night” keep replaying in my head, I was going to be here...all night…with Harry.
I quickly gave in and took a seat on the bed, I’m sure if I didn’t I would have fell to the ground, my legs were so shaky.
“I had fun tonight.” I choked out, finally making eye contact.
He quickly spun around and tucked my hair behind my ear, and kissed me softly on the neck, slowly and gently making his way to my jaw, then my cheek and moving slightly towards my lips.
“Stop…” I slowly breathed out, gently pushing him back a bit.
“Whats wrong?” he said worried examining my face.
“I cant do this, not tonight, not with you.” I sadly said , this time not looking him In the eyes. I didn’t bother waiting for a response I got up and began pacing.
“I go back to Miami in a week and you go back to god knows where, I have a life here and in Miami and you have a life on the road with your band and with your fans, we cant be the reason our lives get messed up.” I blurted out, hearing myself say this just made me sound like an ass.
“You think ill ruin your life?” he sadly asked laying back on the bed trying to understand my mindset.
“Not on purpose but I know if we kiss, I ll love it and want to keep on kissing you and ill want to kiss every inch of your body, and that’s going to lead to sex, and if I have sex with you I ll want to do it everyday all day, and that will make me fall in love with you and if that happens I wont want to leave you.” I keep rambling and rambling not even noticing the words coming out of my mouth. I ran off to the bathroom not giving him a second to respond to my gibberish, I began to rinse my face to try and sober me up, it wasn’t working.
I opened the door and almost walked right into Harry.
“What are …” I began to say
“What if I WANT to love you.” He said cupping my face with both his hands, hypnotizing me again with his eyes.
“What if I want you everyday? What’s wrong with that?” He asked searching my facial expression for some sort of answer.
“We live two completely different lives, It just wouldn’t work, we would end up heart broken, I would end up heart broken!” I gentle spoke backing up towards the door.
He cupped my face again and starred at me with his beautiful green eyes, what I wouldn’t do to have his eyes on me for the rest of my life, his face became closer, and closer and closer until our lips were only an inch away.
“Don’t..” I begged, knowing I truly wanted nothing more than to smash my lips into his.
“Then don’t…” he mocked, lingering his lips on mine.
