Moving is hard. Moving any distance is. I find it hard just to get out of bed in the morning but another whole country? That's much more difficult.
Especially when you have to leave behind your dead boyfriend.
My name is Alexandra Grey. I'm the new...
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"You know Alex, if you're struggling your father and I can arrange for you to see a therapist or a counsellor maybe, you know, someone you can talk to if you need it."
I rolled my eyes, breathing out heavily and resting my head against the window. It had been seven weeks since the funeral.
"I'm fine Mum, I've told you, I don't need a bloody therapist. I've got Maddie to talk to; I can call her everyday if I need to."
My dad raised his eyebrows at my angry dismissal, his startling blue eyes reflecting in the rear view mirror as he stared straight ahead at the road.
"Alexandra please do not swear in front of your brother, it's rather unnecessary darling."
I didn't answer and just stared out at the country flashing by.
My mother muttered under her breath slightly before readjusting her dress twisting round in her seat to talk to me again, "Listen Alex," she began, "please just try and enjoy this move, do it for the family."
I continued to stare out the window.
She sighed and tried again; "Sweetie, I know you never wanted this to happen but I think we just all need a change of scene, especially after the Sam incident and so forth-"
I whipped around and almost snarled "Oh so it's his fault now? Is it's Sam's fault for dying that we have to move to another frickin' country just so your messed up daughter doesn't ruin the family name?"
"Honey-"
"No don't 'honey' me," I spat, "I don't want you mentioning Sam again. Ever. Just let me move on by myself, please?" I gave her a long hard look.
She pinched the bridge of her nose and closed her eyes, opening her mouth to reply before deciding against it and turning around to look out at the road.
I settled back into my seat, readjusting my sweater against the car door before settling my head against it again. I looked down at my ink scrawled hands blinking away the stinging tears that had sprung in my eyes. It was all very well acting tough in front of my parents but the mention of his name made me want to curl up into a ball and never unroll ever again.
I brushed the loose strands of blonde off my forehead, tucking them behind my ears. I picked up my earphones and jammed them into my ears, pressing play and wiping away tears hurriedly. This was so stupid.
I suddenly felt a small hand creep it's way across my knee. I looked up to see James's big blue eyes staring at me in worry. Poor boy growing up in such a messy family, he's only eight. His little fingers curled around mine, twirling the rings around on my index, a tiny smile crawling onto his face. I couldn't help but smile back.
Looking back outside the car, I watched the new landscape roll past. The heat was making my legs stick uncomfortably to the seat, and my whole body felt damp with sweat. Ew. The sun was flickering through the trees that bent over the road, winking between the branches and casting juddering beams onto my eyelids as I closed them.
