The Perfect Sin

Chapter 3

The perfect sin? What does that mean and how can I be considered one? No man has ever given such sweet tidings to me. Well, no man has actually had much of an encounter with me except my Lieutenant  and my father. As I attempt to recall past thoughts, I become aware that Aleksey was still observing me. No doubt, gauging my reaction to his  love confession. How is it that this man, the embodiment of bitterness, can refer to me as his weakness?

 “Katya, what is going on in that head of yours?”

I snort in disbelief. Since when has this man ever cared about my feelings? Does he believe that I will confess all my woes to him and offer myself as a vessel. I do not believe in surrendering, especially to the enemy.

  “Husband as a matter of fact, I was just about to ask the same of you.”

 “When it concerns you, I can not exactly place into words what goes on in my head.”

  Of course his response will have to be that. Thankfully, I am wiser and have learned to play this game. I will make him crack before I submit to him or his “weakness”.

  “Well, that was a nice chat, we should bond more often. How about we go to your war room and discuss the strategy for killing Tsar Vasily.”

 “Very well, Katya. If that is what you want then so be it.”

 “Oh, Aleksey before I forget, I will win this game and you will crumble before me.”

 “Hmmm,  I look forward to seeing the day that you become triumphant. A word of advice, you reject me now but one day you will need me.”

 We walke side by side to the war room. I swear upon the name of the Creator that I have no idea how to win this war, but as long as Tsar Vasily dies then I can be content with life. Gytha says that I should talk about my troubled past, but I believe that what does not kill me can only make me stronger. Eventually the burgundy and navy blue colors stood out against the door frame.

 I brace myself for the impending stares of the Knights. Aleksey grabs my hand but I do not know whether it is for display or if he senses the doubt that rolls off of me. Once we enter the war room, all noise ceases to exist. Aleksey walkes on as if nothing new happened and I decide to follow in his image.

 There are  no separate seatings for the royalty; I pull away from Aleksey and approache a group of low ranking soldiers. Better to start at the bottom of the food chain and work my way up to the top.  The soldiers stop their chatter and bow their heads. Again with this bowing, why can they not look at me while I speak?

 “Please proceed, I want to hear what your job is and tell me your thoughts on the war?”

 “Tsaritsa Yekaterina, please allow me to educate you on the way things are done in our country.”

 “Very well, speak freely.”

 “Go back from whence you came. Here there are men who do not respect you as a person, but respect the title that you are married to. If you care at all then you will not get involved, and never forget that traitorous blood runs bold through your very being.”

  “That is enough, Andor! Do not dishonor yourself by speaking such words against the Tsar and Tsaritsa!”

 I look over my shoulder and my surprise Dmitry stands beside his brothers. Praise be to the Creator for such men! Now only if Aleksey goes missing during this war, then I can marry the next in line for the throne. One can only hope for such mishaps, thankfully they happen all the time.

 “Why, Dmitry. Such a pleasant surprise, but not needed. I demand that Andor speak to me as if I were his equal. No dishonor shall come upon him and his lineage.”

  “Very well, if that is what you desire then who am I to say otherwise.”

 I continue to mix with the soldiers. Most were shocked at my knowledge of strategy, land navigation, and common sense. Honestly not all women are unlearned;  maybe only the nobility lack these qualities. 

  “Your majesty, are you going to come along with us?”, Dmitry suggests.

 “Where are all of you heading off to?”

  “A tavern where we can get food, shelter, and a decent drink.”

 I ponder this but who is to stop me. Aleksey retired to our chambers ages ago. Now it is I, his brothers, and  some soldiers. No trouble can come from such a group. 

 “My answer is yes. Let us go and break bread with our fellow citizens.”

  “Your majesty, no one says ‘break bread’ any longer. Our forefathers used those terms.”

 “Andor, please teach me the ways of our generation. I would hate to sound old especially since I am only twenty-three summers.”

 “Who knew that our Tsaritsa, would be filled with such happiness. Very well, we shall teach you our ways. Men, we must purge the traitorous blood that flows through our Tsaritsa!”

 ‘Here, Here’ is  the response that echoes throughout the empty corridor.  All made their way to the tavern; laughter has become the remedy to my ailment. Each individual thus far has shared with me their own memories, the pain-filled memories as well as the joys of life. The creator has blessed me with such a wonderful group of friends. I am eternally grateful for them and one day I hope to return the favor. 

  "Your majesty, it is an honor to have you in the Bloody Tavern. Would you care to try some mead?"

  I expected the tavern owner to be portrayed like the fictional ones, but this man was a work of art. Young, healthy, broad......nothing like the one that supplied my father with his drinks.

  "Since we all are acquaintances, let’s stop with the 'your majesty' and formalities. Treat me as your equal and equals we shall be! Here, here! Bring the first round of drinks!"

 Once the poison set in there was no turning back. The mead kept coming until the early morn. Instead of hearing others stories, I created my own memories. All night I learned new things and no one spoke of the war or the deaths of fellow comrades. In the morning,  Dmitry accompanied me back to the Palace. Such a noble man, unlike his brother, Aleksey.  I bet he does not even care that I am not present, but one thought dims my moment of happiness. What will Aleksey say when he finds out that I have tarnished  the title of Tsaritsa?