heaven in a wildflower [criminal minds]

chapter one - coffee and printer ink

TW – death (this book follows the storyline of grief if this affects you please feel free to read something else) (there will also be individual TWs at the start of chapters)

(season 7 criminal minds cast)

"The steam from the car's exhaust gently brushed against my feet. I wrapped my arms tighter around myself, pulling my coat closed and tucking my chin downward into my pullover. My breath was now visible under the sporadic streetlights that lit the dark country lane.

The cold sending a chill down my spine and the air smelling of overdue rain. I heard a voice from behind me, 'so how does it feel to be 16?' he called pushing me over as my shoes scraped the icy floor. 'Come here you little shit' I laughed as I hit him over the head with my bag, Jackson just smiled. 'Get in the car you two' my Mom called from the driveway, she walked over to me, hugging me, a wave of warmth and comfort hit me 'happy birthday sweetie' she whispered, 'thanks Mom' I said looking up and kissing her on the cheek. 

My Mom, Dad, and my brother Jackson all piled into the car, we had been driving for a few hours, the rain was heavy and loud, but soothing." I paused taking a deep breath.

"And that's all I can remember"

"We've talked about this Esme, come on," Jenny said looking over me.

"What? I've been at the BAU for almost 3 years now, this has never mattered before and I don't see why it does now." I said getting angry, Jenny was my shrink, not that I needed one but its department policy.

We've gotten pretty close over that last few years, but that's no surprise my file is like a fucking novel.

"It's coming up to the 4-year anniversary," she says, I just sighed,

"Hotch is just trying to look out for you, don't get angry at him," she said, "I know" I replied smiling lightly.

Hotch had always treated me differently, I joined the BAU aged 16, originally just 1 day a week for experience, but 3 years have gone by and i'm working full time as a profiler.

Even though I have only been here 3 years, it feels like home.

"so, you were in the car, what happened next?" Jenny said

"Well, after, there was a murder investigation, the police were stalling. I worked the case, solved it.

I worked with British intelligence and counter-terrorism. We got the gang who ordered the attack, they were testing new explosives.

The British secret service tried to recruit me, but I couldn't stay in that place, so I got a transfer to the states. Did my EMT training, interned at Quantico, and got an offer for the BAU and I've been here ever since". I smiled knowing I'd avoided the question.

"I know that" Jenny looked at me disapprovingly, "don't get smart with me, what happened in the car" she said staring at me deeply.

A knock at the door made me look over to see Penelope, "sorry to interrupt" she looked over to me "we have a case honey".

"We'll talk about this later, stay safe you two," Jenny said as I got up, "saved by the bell" I giggled whispering to her, "bye," she said laughing.

"is everything okay?" Pen said as we walked down the corridor toward the conference room, "oh yeah, just the annual psych evaluation, don't worry".

The conference room smelt like it always did, coffee and printer ink, there was something so homely about it.