dolan twins ; imagines.

↬ angel [vol.5]

[ ps. you might not remember
this series so go re read the last four ! ]

reliving the memories through his eyes and heart is one of the greatest things he left behind, i actually got to see what it was like from his soul, i got to experience the emotions he did. i wipe away the tear that managed to escape as i turn the page

— i love you's ;
love. what a messy but beautiful thing huh? love has made me a better person i'd tell you that, but it also came with pain, which was expected since we are humans, and humans are complicated and messy, i'm not saying that you're complicated and messy i'm just saying that it was never just rainbows and butterflies, but you know what, i wouldn't trade it for the world. we got to grow together and i was glad that it was you who was by my side.

anyway, back to the story, our first i love you's still give me butterflies when i think about them. we were on a call late at night, it was three a.m on the 15th of december. we were talking as we usually do every night, talking about nothing and everything. i don't know what it was that you said but i got the sudden urge to blurt it out, so i said "listen" but it was laced with panic, you asked me what's wrong but fear roamed my body, so i shrugged it off and said never mind. the thoughts of rejection or scaring you away kept yelling in my head.

"don't say 'listen!' then follow up with a never mind you know i hate that" you laughed, and i did too, "no i just forgot" i got nervous and you knew i was lying. you've always been able to see through me. "you don't just forget come on just tell me!" you insisted and i turned you down again and again. i feel like you knew, you knew what i wanted to say so i said "are you expecting me to say something?" and when the words left my mouth your voice sounded upset and you said "alright". i could tell that you were mad oh my god you're mad" i said. and you kept saying that you're not and tried to cover it up with a laugh but i said it again, "no you're mad"

"no i'm not" you said , so i asked "i just.. i don't know man, do you think there's difference between love and being in love?" i thought i'd try to ease into it "i feel like there is, loving someone is just like, having love for them but being in love, is falling in love with the person every-" i cut you off "listen" i said again, "what?"

"i love you"
the words slipped out, both fear and ease ran through my veins, it was in the air now, no take backs, you stayed quiet for a second but it felt like an eternity, "i love you too" you whispered, voice soft and tired, "you don't have to say it" i reassured you, i didn't want you to feel like you have to say it just because i did. "i wouldn't say it if i didn't mean it" you said. hearing it back made butterflies rise in my stomach, it was utter euphoria.

love is the greatest gift you've given me.

forever in my heart, angel.

keep on reading, for the next page
holds one of my favorite memories.

;

surprise it's me!
im trying to start writing again
also this was from a personal
experience haha
this is what i'd imagine
his pov would've been
but anyway i thought it'd b cool
if i used the first time i'd told
someone i love them on here
so much pain </3