" Dear Diary.
Sometimes I can't sleep at night not because I'm scared but because I feel lost I never felt complete like I should I was always told less of myself sometimes I didn't even feel like a human sometimes I cry for help even though no one can hear me or no one will no I broke promises so many..more than counted but I was told it gets better I feel my "better" breaking the thing keeping me held up can go away can get snatched from me in a blink of a eye can hate me if I say one word he is a person not a prize I will leave it at that goodbye xoxox -Joey " With that Joey flipped his book closed and turned out the light. While Joey was turning out the light Shane was grabbing his coat and walking outside it was dark outside the only lights that was shining was the lights of the city everything looked so alive with the colors flashing but all the houses around him was definitely asleep he kept walking he didn't know where he was going but needed too think about things everything seemed so unrealistic after a few minutes of walking he reached the park bench where him and Joey sat a few days before this park meant a lot too Shane it had so much meaning he would remember all the times him and Joey snuck out together and just smile Shane wanted too take Joey away from this place he was so unhappy it wasn't hard too tell Shane never said it but Joeys mom was a ungrateful Bitch although Joey already knew that she was from the bruises she left on his side and the yelling and fighting as if the beatings wasn't enough he always kind of just wondered why or what he did too deserve this but he didn't care as much anymore since Shane slipped into his life Shane was into a deep thought what could happen? " I love you" Shane said pulling Joey closer too him by his waist. The boy smiled back at Shane and whispered something quietly in his ear "I love you too" he could hear Joey giggle after he said it "Can I be honest?" Shane asked Joey in a serious tone "sure about what?" Joey asked as his face filled with concern pushing Shane too set down with him on the bench " I love you so much and I need you please never leave me don't ever go I have loved you since the day we first met please be mine? Joey smiled wrapping his arms around the older boy and giving him a quick kiss on the cheek then something started hitting them almost like drops of something" Rain started pouring from the sky Shane must have been thinking a while it got slightly colder and the wind was blowing making it worse but all Shane could think about is his day dream he just had everything he said was it true? Or are these the things he will never say? Shane walked home with the sound of rain pounding on the sidewalk and his mind arguing with the feelings and things he will "never" say.
----------------------Next Day------------------------
Joey woke up bright and early too a woman calling his name she sounded upset "Joseph get your ass down stairs now" the voice roared Joey had too admit he was afraid knowing it was his mother she was this rude too him all the time he was use too it but it still hurt when he was younger she was nothing like this. Joey rolled himself out of bed walking down stairs expecting too see beer bottles and the scent of smoke coming from the living room and his expectations wasn't wrong "Yes?" Joey asked in a shaky voice, "I need you too watch the house this week no friends or your grounded got it?" The woman said blankly in a irritated tone. "Whatever" Joey muttered, "What did you say?" The woman's voice now raised, "Nothing" Joey said walking back up too his room before his mom could say anything else " 8 Am?!?" Joey thought too himself while shoving a pillow into his face suddenly he heard a ding come from his phone " 1 new unread message from "Shaney "Hey I know you are probably not up but good morning :)" Joey smiled as he read the text and replied with " Good morning! :)", "Can I come over today?" Shane texted Joey replied with a simple "Yes" Then remembered what his mother said but then he didn't really care it never really came too mind why he wanted Shane too always be around besides he made him happy and his smile was breath taking not too mention you could get lost in his eyes he wanted too hug Shane and kiss him and tell him how much he loved him but these are just the things he will never say. "Okay see you in a bit bye boo" Shane replied and Joeys stomach filled with butterflies.
----------------------Later That Day----------------------
After Shane texted Joey bye he got up and ate some breakfast his mother had made. It was a calm morning Shanes mom was at work so it was just him he went upstairs too the bathroom and took a shower still thinking about Joey and what he felt he brushed it off as he imagined all his troubles being washed away by the warm water hitting and falling off his skin he stayed until the water became slightly cold and dried off putting on a Black shirt and a pair of skinny jeans on he looked in the mirror almost satisfied until he realized he hadn't fixed his hair yet he wasn't feeling like messing with his hair so he just put a beanie over it . After a while of Shane looking in the mirror being cocky he ran over too Joeys house knocking on the door Joey answered "Come in" Joey said smiling Shane smiled back and allowed himself in "I need too tell you something Shane" Joey said. Shane grew panicked
