The Darkest Secret

Tears are words the heart cant say

  I hid under comfy blankets and soft pillow with my favourite bear cuddles but it didn’t feel right instead the blankets felt rough and heavy, pillows like rocks and my head was pounding and distant very distant. Even my bedroom wall covered in a collage of quotes and pictures seemed to weep after years of appearing happy and full of joy. 

My phone buzzes over and over again but not once do I pick it up, it will only be people offering me there symphony but I don’t want to hear it, I just want my sister back. It’s all my fault I scream through stiff cries and high yelps. I cry deeply into my pillow and through my hands around just like a little kid throwing a tantrum. After ages I slowly began to pull myself together and pick up my phone I have 5 missed calls from my best friend a text saying “suck it up” from the ‘queen bee’ at school and OMG a text from the cute guy I like,  Harry.

 Harry is my best friends brother I know that probably against the rules in some no existent book but it doesn’t matter to me I can’t help what I feel. Plus a guy like him would never like a girl like me anyway. Harry hangs out with the ‘cool’ group with all the cheerleaders and other football players. Whenever I walk past they always look me up and down just like the mean characters do in the movies. But here he was texting me, maybe he got the wrong number. The text read “hold on everything will get better”.What on earth does that mean? 

I bet he means it as something cocky like I’m on the edge of a cliff about to kill myself or something, the jerk he doesn’t know what it’s like to lose someone you love, my heart has been shattered and ripped out of my chest. I cry and scream into my pillow why doesn’t anyone understand? Why? I scream helplessly Why did this happen?   But most of all I KILLED MY SISTER? My mum must have heard my cries and screams as she came running to my side closely followed by dad; they hugged and cried with me for awhile. After ages our cries suddenly came to a stop that’s when mum handed me a poster which must have come in the post. It read ‘be strong’ and on the back was a note saying

                                                             ‘Cause I know you are                            

                        Love Harry xx’