Soulmate Love Crisis

3

"I guess, but you know things happen so I'm okay. Anyway what was that second thing you wanted to ask?"

"Right, um- I just wanted to ask if..." Jiyoo took a deep breath; scared of rejection from Seojun, "I wanted to ask if you wanted to hang out sometime."

"I- Sure, we can hang out. What did you have in mind?"

Jiyoo played with his fingers, "I don't really know, I was hoping you had an idea."

"Hm..." Seojun thought for a few moments, "We could go to a bookstore."

"A bookstore?"

"Oh come on, don't make it seem like it's boring or anything!"

"No no, that's not what I was thinking! I was just shocked that that was your suggestion."

"I mean, bookstores are really cool if you think about it."

Jiyoo cocked his head to the side, "Are you being forreal right now?"

Seojun nodded with a serious look on his face, "Yep."

"Um- I'm sorry, I just- what in your mind makes you think bookstores are cool? You know what, nevermind. Bookstore it is!"

Seojun cheered happily and was shaking with literal excitement. Jiyoo, on the other hand, was conflicted with both fear and excitement. He couldn't even believe that he worked up enough courage to ask Seojun out. Well did he really ask him out? Honestly, Jiyoo didn't necessarily care if you could call it asking him out. He was just happy he did it.

"Anyway, when did you wanna go?" Seojun interrupted the blonde's thoughts.

"Um, tomorrow at 4:30?"

Jiyoo mentally cursed at himself for saying 4:30.

"Sure! Should I swing by your place so we can walk together or should we meet there?"

Jiyoo blushed furiously, "To-together? N-no, it's fine! I'll just meet you there, okay?"

Seojun stared at Jiyoo with a smug look on his face.

"What's wrong? Why don't you wanna walk with me?"

"U-um... I- I have to um, feed my cat and give her a bath? Yea, that's what I have to do!" Jiyoo retorted, clearly in a midst of panic.

Jiyoo didn't even have a cat. He mentally face palmed himself. He would've loved to walk with Seojun, but he was scared that he would say the wrong thing. Plus he wanted to wear something more worthy of a "date", technically half the outfits he wears to school don't even compare to "date" material.

Seojun raised an eyebrow and looked at Jiyoo suspiciously, "Yea, okay...," he said, not believing a word the blonde said.

"I'm sorry," Jiyoo cried out of embarrassment.

"It's-"

Before Seojun could comfort Jiyoo, Mrs. Kwan and the other students walked back inside the classroom. Seojun was clearly annoyed and looked towards Jiyoo with a bit of concern. To his surprise, Jiyoo wasn't even looking at him. He had cleaned off his desk and rested his head back on his desk all in the span of a few minutes. Seojun thought it would be better not to bother him and turned his attention towards the front of class. He crossed his arms over his chest and leaned back, still annoyed that he couldn't keep talking to the cute blonde. Cute? Did he really call Jiyoo cute? Technically, he really was. The little giggles and smiles he gave off sort of made Seojun's heart skip a beat. He really couldn't believe what he was thinking... Jiyoo, cute. The black haired male decided to make a mental block about these thoughts until tomorrow.

____

"Alright class, make sure to read tonight for homework. If no one has any questions, you're dismissed," Mrs. Kwan said towards the end of the day.

Seojun sighed and stood, slinging his backpack over his shoulder while turning towards Jiyoo, "Jiyoo," he nudged his shoulder gently.

He didn't move a muscle.

"Jiyoo, come on, it's time to go home," He nudged him again.

The blonde responded with a mumbled mess of words that the raven couldn't quite catch, but he assumed he was telling him 'no'. Seojun sighed, thinking of a way to wake the blonde up... And then, he spotted it. Tucked away under one of Jiyoo's arms was a small green notebook. Seojun had no clue what it was but he knew that a lot of people would get upset if you took something that was theirs, so he did just that. Instead of trying to be sneaky, Seojun wanted to get caught on purpose and took the notebook quickly. He waited a few moments. He had successfully taken the notebook but the reaction he expected didn't happen.

"Aish, Jiyoo, if you don't get up I'm gonna look through this," He teased.

Jiyoo woke up in an instant, "What? Look through what?" Jiyoo looked up at Seojun with question.

The smaller blonde looked slightly to his left and saw his notebook clenched in Seojun's hand. He instantly became pale.

"I-I'm, I'm up now.... Please don't look through it," The smaller pleaded.

Seojun watched his face with a lot of confusion. What could be in this notebook that Jiyoo didn't want him to see? Were they drawings? Personal notes? Seojun's mind raced. He had no clue what could be concealed in this innocent looking notebook but he returned it nonetheless. Jiyoo took it and stuffed it into his bag before looking back up at Seojun to meet his hooded hazels.

"Thanks... I'll see you tomorrow," Was all Jiyoo could mutter.

He quickly pushed past the taller and made his commute home. Upon arriving at his home, Jiyoo threw his school bag to the side as he collapsed into a rolled up ball on the floor against his front door. Jiyoo couldn't cry, and yet... he felt his face and nose burn with the feeling. His glasses fogged up from the heat of his face. Why was he like this? If Seojun found out he was like this, it would be over for him. Everything he's working so hard for would all go to waste and he couldn't afford for that to happen. He really felt a connection with Seojun and he didn't wanna mess it up. He sat up so his back was against the door. He didn't have the energy to cook, he didn't have the energy to cry, he didn't have the energy to care. Jiyoo wanted to give up but his heart was telling him otherwise.

Instead of doing his normal nightly routine, Jiyoo stood up slowly, wobbling in the process and walked to his bedroom. He flopped on his bed tiredly and just stared at the ceiling. The thoughts on his mind raced and never dissipated.

"Should I even go to school?" He asked himself and sighed.

He debated in his head for a few minutes as he closed his eyes and took a deep breath, falling asleep in the process.