i fell in love in 1914 ~ l.s

🌛 18 🌛

(A/n: the beginning looks boring, but please read it, it's important to know what Louis thinks so you understand his motives (I'm saying this because I usually only read dialogue because the rest is boring). And don't forget to vote :p

Now that I look at it it's actually kinda short idk why I felt the need to say that. Anygays, enjoy!)

~ Louis ~

As I let my fingers brush against his, I'm deciding if I should take his hand. I hope my feelings won't get the best of me, but I'm scared that they already did. I care more about Harry than I should. His feelings are very important to me, probably more important than my own feelings.

I don't see how this could end well, even if he felt the same about me, we will never be able to have a public relationship. We'd have to hide our love, he doesn't deserve that.

But he doesn't feel the same about me. He can't. I hope he doesn't, that'd be bad. I'd rather suffer of unrequited love than making him have to hide.

I always want him to be able to express his emotions, he can't if he'd fall for me. I should stop flirting with him to keep him happy. But what if I make him happy? I've never been more conflicted.

Harry then takes my hand and holds it tightly. I think he made the choice for me.

~ Harry ~

I take his hand and instantly feel a lot better. Louis kept brushing his hand against mine without actually taking it.

"It's almost 1915." I say.

"And soon enough you'll be twenty one." He says.

"I'm excited." I tell him.

"Why? Once you grow up, you can never come back." He sounds like he's personally offended by the fact that I'm excited for my birthday.

"I want to be taken more seriously. I always thought that once you grow older people will take you more seriously." I say.

"The older you get the more you learn, but I take children far more serious than stupid adults." He says.

"Do I need to remind you that you're an adult?" I ask teasingly.

"Don't you dare, I'd rather stay in denial. The pretty lie hurts much less than the ugly truth." He tells me.

The pretty lie that there's a chance of Louis feeling the same way about me does feel better than the fact that no man, or boy, could ever like me, just because of my gender.

"You said you wanted to be taken more seriously. Who doesn't take you seriously?" He questions.

"My mom, my sister, my aunt, my uncle, my cousin, everyone." I say.

"Why don't they take you seriously?" He asks.

"I'm the youngest of the family, I'm the most sensitive and I'm shy. They treat me like some child. I could've just stayed at my rich aunt and uncle. But I wanted to go to war to prove myself but now that I'm back, they'll definitely won't take me seriously." I tell him. "They never do, they act like I'm some fragile doll and they keep infantilising me."

"They're stupid anyways, who cares about what adults think? You told me about you sister, she's one year older than I am isn't she?" Louis asks.

"Yeah she is." I say.

"Well then she clearly is old, anyone who's older than me isn't allowed to share their opinion unless it's valuable." He says, making me laugh.

"And you decided that?" I ask.

"Of course, I'm the omniscient oracle." He says and I laugh really loudly. I don't think anyone heard me because the music is so loud.

It's good that they didn't hear me, those people who's laughs are fake would probably get jealous because I never have to fake a smile when I'm with Louis.

I move a little closer to Louis, our sides are now against each other, and I lay my head on his shoulder while looking at the stars.

He tightens his grip on my hand and whispers: "I take you really seriously, the fact that you show your emotions is only a sign of strength, you're not weak or anything."

I can't not cry, it's physically impossible. I try to stay quiet, but I'm crying too hard. Louis pulls me closer so I can cry against his chest. I'm pretty sure his shirt is getting wet because of my tears but he doesn't seem to mind.

I don't move from his chest once I'm done crying. I push my face into the crook of his neck and I breathe in his scent.

"I lost my notebook, I miss it." Louis seems to be talking to no one in particular.

Didn't I take his notebook? I'm pretty sure he gave it to me when I left, after when everyone started firing shots again. I don't know where I left it, I think I kept it in the pocket of my coat (the new coat I got because Louis had my old one).

I'm not sure so I don't tell him yet, I don't want to give him hope, only to disappoint him. It might've blown up if I left it at my place in the trenches.

"Weren't you the one who told me to look at the stars? Because you haven't looked at them for a while and we have to go inside soon, I don't want you to miss them." Louis says.

"Why do we have to go inside soon?" I ask, I'm a little disappointed, I like it here.

He chuckles softly and runs his fingers through my hair. "Because we're getting cold out here." He says. "And we don't want the rich guys to notice that their coats aren't in the cloakroom."

"I don't want to go inside, I like laying under the stars with you." I say truthfully.

Louis then decides to roll us over. He now hovers above me while I lay on my back. "We can lay here any night, we got our whole lives ahead of us. The stars won't go anywhere, and neither am I." He says.

Is he implying that he's planning on staying around for long? Because that'd be good. I want him around, always, forever.

"I want to lay here every night." I tell him.

"I think it's safe to say that that can definitely be arranged." Louis says while pushing his nose against mine.

"Pinky promise?" I say while holding my little finger up.

"Pinky promise." He assures me while hugging my finger with his finger.