Blood Bound

Chapter 21 - Punctum Fractionis

A/N

Hi everyone, I know this chapter is a little overdue it took me ages to write the thing. I do want to say that in this chapter can be triggering for people who have suffered from substance abuse so please read at your own discretion. 

Enjoy!

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By the time Monday's classes had rolled around the next morning, Hermione's delivery from the apothecary had yet to be delivered. Not willing to discuss the fact that she was well and truly addicted at this point, she kept this to herself. And that was how she found herself hunched over the cool porcelain of the loo in a girl's bathroom on the second floor.

She'd stubbornly decided to go to her classes today, and had been on the way to an early breakfast so as to avoid most of her friends when a wave of nausea hit her out of nowhere. After throwing up the contents of her stomach -which was mostly bile as she'd yet to eat today-, Hermione shakily sat back against the door of the stall. The cool tiles under her body helped some, but not nearly as much as she needed to be able to get to her feet just yet.

Hermione didn't know how long she sat there on the floor of the girl's bathroom, vision swimming with black spots and entire body shaking. But she heard voices as girls came and went on their way to classes, giggling and gossiping without a care in the world.Bitches.  By the time she felt well enough to peel herself off the ground and retrieve her wand to check the time, it was almost the end of breakfast.

Risking a glance in the mirror, the sight that stared back at her was so awful she had to laugh, or she might've cried. Her hair was damp with sweat around her face, and her clothes were completely dishevelled. Her skin was white as parchment and not only were her hands shaking but her teeth were chattering slightly as well. The worst -but most laugh inducing- part of it all was the fact that her eyes were completely bloodshot. Or, well, bloodshot wasn't the right term. All of the vessels in her eyes were standing out against the white of her sclera, except they were blue. The exact same shade of blue she so fondly recognized from the potion.

She brought a hand up to touch her face, not entirely believing her reflection wasn't being cruel and making her look worse than she was. It was then that she realized, as her hand lightly pressed against the bags under her eyes, that her fingertips had taken on the exact same shade of blue as her eyes. Oh, fucking Merlin's Christ she thought as she groaned aloud.

It's fine she reassured herself nothing you can't fix with a few glamour charms. Realizing she was going to be late if she agonized over her reflection any longer, she cast some simple charms on herself, so she didn't look quite so much like she'd crawled out of her own grave. Once her order came in from the apothecary, everything would be fine again. She could get through one day of classes sober. Sure, she had no cigarettes or potion, and she only had half a flask of tequila; but it wouldn't kill her. She could do this.

Without giving herself a chance to change her mind, Hermione walked out of the bathroom and down the hallway, letting her thoughts race as she hurried towards the classroom. Hermione Granger wasn't stupid, she didn't just get the title 'Brightest witch of her age' for nothing. She was rational and logical, and she knew that she was well and truly addicted to her sine sensu. She knew that she needed intervention, and that the side effects she was displaying after a day's withdrawal were severe and dangerous. But the issue was, Hermione also knew that if she were to ask for help, she'd have to stop with the potions and the alcohol and the cigarettes, and then she'd have nothing to protect her from the onslaught of other people's thoughts. And that was so much worse.

Before the potions she'd been a wreck, the first week and a half had been awful. Hermione can confidently say that she would willing lay herself down on the floor of Malfoy Manor and offer Bellatrix Lestrange her other arm before she ever went back to the time before she'd started with the potions.