Malign Disposition [H.S]

Chapter 33 - Fragments

Harry

All I could hear was the music.

When that song came on, that's all I could focus on and it brought me right back to that very moment in the car, a few seconds before the crash.

I still felt the way the warm wind was drifting through my fingers and how hard the sun was beating down that day. I remember how my father turned around to say something and that was the last time I ever saw his face.

I was so lost in my head that I barely heard the words coming out of Marley's mouth, I just kept trying to replay the part where I saw my dads face for the last time, but instead all I could see was the big puddles of blood and the broken limbs that were sprawled out in front of me.

And maybe I wouldn't be so weak if I never ended up being so dependent on them.

I can admit that I was, because growing up was hard for me. I wasn't considered normal. I was a loser and I never felt safe at school, at the park, walking home.

But I felt safe with my mum and dad.

When I told Marley that my worst fear was losing someone I love forever, it's true. I have already lived through it but it cripples me to think about because I really don't think I can handle going through that again. That's why I'm so protective over my team.

That's why I promised myself that after my parents and after what I endured with Jeneva, I would never get too emotionally attached to someone ever again. I don't think my heart will ever be ready to reset again.

It's been ages since I've had one of these episodes I honestly don't even remember the last time I had one up until now, and usually I am always alone to deal with them, so the fact I had one in front of Marley was just the absolute fucking worse.

I've broke down in front of her more than she has with me, and I fucking kidnapped, and took her away from her entire life. She should be the one crying on my shoulder.

I am pathetic.

I needed to get my shit together because this can't begin to happen again, not now when we had so much on our plate to deal with. I am not going to be the reason for our down fall.

Everything about Marley seemed so familiar, and there was something about her that always seemed to make the whole car crash so much more vivid in my mind when she's around.

Whenever I catch myself thinking about that day, she always fucking comes to mind now and it's frustrating and triggering. Maybe it's because she's constantly around, 24/7.

And just when I thought this morning couldn't get any worse, bullets began to fly through the living room windows and this was not the time to piss me off.

I fell out of bed this morning, burnt my hand over ten times trying to make fucking pancakes, basically lost my mind in front of Marley, and fuck, I had a meeting with Jason Delware to worry about.

Now this.

I watched as she didn't hesitate to stand up onto her feet which was really bold of her considering there were people ruthlessly shooting though my kitchen. She grabbed the pistol and cocked it back, ducking down beside me.

"Stay here."

I said as I got up from my sitting position and into a crouch instead.

"No, I was actually planning on running out there so that they can play target practice with me." The sarcasm dripped from her tongue and I simply huffed in response.

I didn't say another word before taking a deep breath and sprinting towards the hallway towards the other rooms on the main level. Marley just turned her head to watch me and I could tell she was just pissing her pants that I left her there alone, but we couldn't just have one gun.