Malign Disposition [H.S]

Chapter 35 - Beneath The Surface

Play the song above when you see the (+) somewhere in this chapter. it's worth scrolling back up for.

I am very proud of this chapter and it's probably my favourite so far. Let me know what your favourite chapter is, I'm curious :)

Love you.

Marley

Scratching and scribbling.

That was the noises that have woken me up out of my sleep. I'm positive it had to be well into the evening by now. I really don't have a concept of time anymore.

Harry and I had gone to bed close to seven in the morning, and at this point our sleep schedule is non existent.

We tend to go to bed when it's fitting for us, and it usually ends up being very early in the morning by the time our heads finally meet our pillows.

He did end up carrying me to the washroom and proceeded to run me a bath which I told him was not necessary. But he did anyways because he is stubborn, and of course I appreciated it.

He also decided to sit on the washroom floor to keep me company, while he scrolled through his laptop to finally check his emails that he has been procrastinating on reading.

When I had told him my insides literally felt bruised he was very concerned because he kept thinking the worst, I don't think I've seen him so panicked in my life it was priceless.

"Does it hurt that bad?"

"What if I ended up actually hitting your guts or something?"

"No like seriously, do you feel like you're internally bleeding?"

He seemed more worried about my poor vagina than the time I got shot in the damn chest.

And fuck, it was uncomfortable to even lay on my back because my ass cheeks are raw from the force of the belt cracking down on me. When I looked in the mirror afterwards, I had small little cuts from the edge of the leather along with bruising.

He was not lying when he said he was going to use me, I really should stop underestimating him.

And my neck looks like someone tried to strangle me to death due to the giant bruise running along the front of my throat from the leather. I mean he basically did, I am not complaining though one bit.

Before I met Harry I really didn't know that I would be so into degradation, nor did I realize I had a pain kink. I wonder what he likes, if he put his ego aside and the fact that he craves to constantly be in control, I would love to find out.

He seemed so far away afterwards though and in his head, that it was somewhat concerning. He was also being very distant after I had stepped out of the bath and my anxiety immediately took over and began to think that I had done something .

He kept saying that it wasn't my fault and I'm not sure what he meant by that. What wasn't my fault?

It did make my stomach twist and and I was starting to think he was just using me for sex at this point because of how he tends to act after wards. It sort of hurt, but I get it. I really shouldn't even be surprised when it comes to him.

I could tell Harry was no longer beside me and that's usually how I wake up from my sleep, he never seems to get much rest even when we don't have much to do.

It's almost like he's afraid to sleep, because I highly doubt he got more than four hours worth. I'm pretty sure I felt his arm leave my waist hours ago but I was still very much asleep.