This story is the definition of trouble in paradise.
What Shai-Anna believed to be a normal trip to Jamaica turned out to be much more than what met the eye. One week away gave her the ability to see what had been underneath her nose this entire ti...
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Shai Louis
I stared at Kingston's face as he peered deeply into my eyes, his mouth moved as if it were in slow motion and his eyes read nothing but sadness and despair. It was evident that he had taken off a bit of weight. Although his hair was freshly trimmed and he dressed up really nicely, by the state of his room alone; I knew this hadn't been the case until his family arrived.
It genuinely hurt my heart to see the amount of pain I caused him. The amount of pain that I had no choice against.
"Earth to Shai. Are you even listening to me?" He flashed his hand before my face and I quickly blinked back into the present.
"I'm so sorry... I drifted off for a moment there." I shook my head, trying to pull it together. "My apologies, that is it that you were asking me?"
"I need to hear the story again, Shai."
"Kingston. I've told you the story about four times now."
"Yeah and I'm still having a hard time wrapping my head around the fact that you found it in your heart to do this to me. If you needed space to clear your head, if you needed space to heal... you of all people know that I would understand. What you went through was far from easy! But come on Shai! The least you could've done is told me that you were alive..."
"I... I know. I wasn't thinking at the time. I was just scared and afraid."
"Which I understand, after everything; you have all right to be. But afraid of me, Shai?!" He placed his palm against his chest, continuing to stare into my eyes in disbelief. "Out of all people, me?"
"In that very moment, all I could think about was myself. All I could think about was healing from this situation. As much as you did run across my mind, I just knew that I wasn't ready. I needed to get better first."
"That's some bullshit." He spat, "I'm sorry to say, but that's some real serious bullshit. Both on your end and my mother's... Shai-Anna, do you know how many nights I cried? The amount of times I couldn't find an appetite? I lost sleep, I haven't been to work in three months, as you can see for the most part my condo is trashed!" He picked up some of the clothes, holding it up as an example. "Yes, I get that you needed to heal but all you needed to do was tell me that! What kind of sick, twisted person fakes their own death?"
I held my head down and sighed, the more intense he got was the harder that it was for me. As much as I wanted to open my mouth and just say it, I couldn't. I was tired of the cycle, tired of the outlandish drama that I knew would come. As much as I hadn't purposely faked my death, the idea of healing wasn't far from the truth. I had time to really gain some form of peace while being in Jamaica. In a way, it was what I needed although it wasn't the way I would've gone about it.
Mrs. Hines had explained briefly what was going down while I was at the hospital. Of course, it all sounded crazy and almost impossible to wrap my head around but I chose not to question it. As mentioned, I was drained from all the drama. I wanted no parts in it, all I wanted was to get back to living life as normal and if it meant just sitting in a hospital bed for three months; I was willing to do so.
