Love & Ruins (#2)

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fourteen: Maggie

The passage of time has moved at a derivative pace for me these past few years.

The kind where I'm just watching every second, minute, and hour fly idly by, no longer regarding their significance that I don't even bother asking what time of the day it is anymore. All I know is that I want it to be over so I can indulge in the hours where my mind briefly slips into unconsciousness, forcing me to forget all my mundane responsibilities.

Life, in general, just seems to navigate at a river's velocity where the stream keeps on moving but there aren't any visible pit stops. You continue even despite the occasional boulders that stand in your way, as you've grown accustomed to being one with them.

It all started to blend together that I could barely distinguish normality from obstacles.

... But in that fleeting moment where familiar hazel eyes met my own, time had suddenly moved at an axis that felt all too intimate but alienating at the same time.

When the heart beats at a speed I never thought it would beat again, not until I saw him, and it wasn't until he vanished from my line of sight that it had dawned on me that the thrill I've longed for all this time could only be felt when... he was there.

With his bronze skin and tousled brown hair, I felt that tantalizing thrill only he could manage to give rush through me as if I was suddenly brought back from the ocean depths.

He gave me that fresh intake of air I've needed whilst simultaneously stealing it away from me.

Because he's here, he's actually here.

Evan is here.

Everything seemed so surreal that I couldn't determine whether I wanted the moment to last or to end as soon as it began, it was just so abrupt that the intensity it bore became too much for me to handle. If I were to accurately convey it through words, it was like seeing the ghost of a past loved one. Too enthralled to look away but too overwhelmed to endure some more.

I could never really decide what I was feeling when it came to him. He either gave me too much or too little of something to work with.

It wasn't until he had exited the campus was when I was able to recollect my bearings and to identify the appropriate type of emotions that I should feel, which later on ended up being anxiety, as I promptly turned to Levi to gauge his reaction only to see he was too busy talking to his friends to pay any mind to our surroundings let alone to who I just saw.

"Hey," he called out softly after he turned to look at my bewildered face "You look rattled. Is something wrong?"

"I-I..." I stammered, blinking profusely "I just... didn't you see-"

"See what, babe?" he asked, gently kissing my forehead.

My eyebrows furrowed, pondering whether I should pester him about it and raise unnecessary alarm or keep it to myself until I could make sense of what I witnessed because God knows I don't need Levi to resort to confiding in... him.

I gulped, choosing to set it aside "Nothing. I just thought I saw one of those gigantic sewer rats people keep saying they see around the city."

His face distorted in disgust before he let out a chuckle "It was probably nothing, have you gotten enough sleep last night? Maybe your eyes are just playing tricks on you."

I do wish that were the case and that my eyes were indeed playing tricks on me, resulting in delusions that I'd get every now and then whenever my mind wanders to areas of my imagination that reminisced him and therefore, tried to compensate by creating fantasies.